tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-69377635364277877842024-02-19T20:33:32.982-08:00#PoundSignThe Musing of a Patriarchy Smashing, Veggie eating, board gaming, bookworm and animal lover extraordinaire!
Look out for new posts every Tuesday!
Sabrinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00155177315384058655noreply@blogger.comBlogger48125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6937763536427787784.post-24927456566692176732017-01-24T18:44:00.000-08:002017-01-24T18:45:01.913-08:00As We Go Marching, Marching<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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This past Saturday I, along with 50,000 other people, were part of the Philadelphia Women's March. I thought I would share my experience with you all. All photos shared here are from the Philly March and were either taken by me are by my cousin Patti. </div>
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I headed down to my cousin's house late Friday night after work. We are lucky that Patti lives a train ride away from Philly and were able to sleep until about 630am to head to the march. As we arrived at that train station, we began to watch other groups of women show up and just standing there I felt a strong sense of pride that lasted me throughout the day. The women I saw were both young and old and as we boarded the train, there were smiles all around. There were a great many stops in between us and Philly and at each stop more and more protesters joined the train carrying posters, decked out in hats, pins and shirts all showing their solidarity. Some people even got cheers for their shirts. It was a happy, peaceful hum on the train. </div>
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The march start point was a sight to see. All of the creative signs and everyone was seriously polite. My coworker/friend was somewhere in the crowd and we said we would try to meetup but both of us seriously doubted it with such a massive crowd. And P.S. Patti and I are TNW (Tiny Nasty Women) making this task even more difficult. The signs became more useful than street signs to find on another. What was so amazing though was the crowd let people pass. Simple "excuse me" or "pardon me" was all that was needed to get through. People would part for you. And as anyone who has been in a Philly crowd before that was truly shocking. Because of this we were able to find each other fairly quickly. </div>
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There were without a doubt far more people in attendance than they were prepared for, which was the theme around the country. From what I read from the predictions, they were prepared for 20-30k but 50k+ that showed. Because of this the march took a bit for everyone to actually get moving. We were stationed at what looked to be towards the front and we didn't move for a good 20 or so minutes after the march was supposed to start. Once we were moving there were people on the sidelines and in the middle partitions cheering us on which was wonderful. The march route was shorter than we had imaged and when we got to the end we were unable to hear the speakers. As previously said, they clearly were not ready for the vast number of us and most of the speakers did not seem like they had been to a rally before. The only speaker I heard throughout their speech was the CEO of Planned Parenthood. She clearly was used to outdoor public speaking and this greatly helped. When making our way out of the crowd at the end, the Women's March was joined by a Pride March and a Black Lives Matter March. And we were pumped! I quickly got out of the way(we were walking towards them) and starting cheering them on. I will say that those two marches had their chants DOWN. They were smaller groups and were able to keep their chants going throughout and holy hell did they have energy! </div>
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After the March, what surprised me the most was the amount of "thank you"s I got on social media, through text and in person. I was slightly overwhelmed but in a good way. What I also received was a small backlash from one person. I was honestly surprised that only one person said something negative towards me about the march. </div>
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What I was happily surprised at was some of my coworkers responses. There were a couple people who voted for Trump who were very positive about the March and asked me how it went and were specifically interested in the signs. I had initially been worried that I would have a very comfortable interaction with someone at work but everyone was very positive. That, to me, is part of what makes America great. We don't have to see eye to eye on everything but the ability to have calm discussions, that do not lead to name calling, is something that this country at it's best has fostered. </div>
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Not a single arrest was made at any of the Women's Marches. I never doubted for a moment that the marchers would be non-violent. Women's marches and rallies have a history of the protesters being nonviolent in the US, even when attacked by the people on the sidewalks or police. That was my main concern for the protesters across the country. But my experience in Philly was that everyone was helpful, supportive and polite. We were met with smiles from everyone, police included. **Note: I believe that the majority of the police in this country are honest, decent people and that there are bad apples that do more than give police a bad name, they get the ones who do their jobs without prejudice, killed. I recognize that may be my privilege talking** </div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><b>Why I Marched</b></span></h2>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">This is why Unicorns are my favorite animal of all time!</td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">I marched to protesting the defunding of women's organizations, ones that cover
both our health and those that work to protect women and children from
abuse. I marched to stop the defunding of public schools. I marched to stand in solidarity with people of color, those with disabilities,
the LGBTQ community, and those who choose or do not choose to practice a
religion. I stand against fear mongering and hateful language. <b> My hope</b> is that these marches have woken<span class="text_exposed_show">
our representatives and senators up to the fact that we will not sit
ideally by as they try to take away all that we have fought for. (We
want our fully covered mammograms, birth control, and annual checkups
back!) We are their employers and they work for us. And if this many people
showed up to rally, imagine how many will show up to vote them out of
office. <b>And they do not have the luxury of an electoral college to save
them.</b></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span class="text_exposed_show"><b>Moving Forward and What We All Can Do</b></span></span></h2>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span class="text_exposed_show">Since the March I have taken my friend Lauren's suggestion and joined NOW and am in the stages of starting a chapter in NEPA. I have emailed my government officials and I will be attending a letter writing party held by a fellow member of my feminist group. Writing a letter/email or calling your government representatives may seem like a small act but they do make a difference and it's something that even the busiest of people can do. For those that have more time, look into your local area and find non-profits that you believe in and volunteer your time. Look for local candidates and political campaigns that you identify with and support them in whatever way(s) you can. If you have the monetary resources look into non-profits at the local, state and federal level and donate to them, even if it's just $10. And most of all keep yourself aware of what is going on. Read factual information, even if you have to go out of your way to find it. We are all in this together. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span class="text_exposed_show"><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HKEr5U8ERgc">The title of this blog post is from a song "Bread and Roses" about the 1912 strike. You can listen to it here. </a> </span> </span></div>
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Sabrinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00155177315384058655noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6937763536427787784.post-55856363383250570982016-12-20T23:28:00.002-08:002016-12-20T23:30:21.188-08:002016 Book Review: Top 10Anyone who has been with me from the beginning of this blog knows that I am co-founder of a competitive book club. We've been going strong for 3 years now and this year I may actually win *ques evil laugh*. For those of you who have zero idea what I am talking about and do not want to dig through the archives, Competitive Book Club is where we read whatever we want to in a calendar year, meet monthly to discuss the books and whomever reads the most in the year wins and gets to assign a book to be read the next year.<br />
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This year, with the holidays looming, I feel safe calling it at 61 books for the year. I wanted to write about my favorite books that I read this year because obviously I haven't been able to talk enough about them. Some of these are series so I will only highlight the first of the series. But here are my favorite books I read in 2016 in no particular order:<br />
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1) Eragon by Christopher Paolini<br />
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This was the first series I read this year and I devoured these books. What is so fascinating is that the writer was in his teens and these were his first books he ever wrote. You can't quite understand how mind blowing this is until you read them. The story itself is captivating and is well written. I love Harry Potter, but the first couple of books, while the story is wonderful, the writing is not so much.<br />
This series is about a boy, his dragon and a revolution. And unlike most other books on this list it is appropriate for younger kids, maybe 10 and up and still hella interesting if you're an adult. Eragon creates a full world that, at the end of the fourth book, you're not ready to let go of.<br />
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2) The Girl in the Spider's Web by David Lagercrantz<br />
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I LOVE The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo series and I was seriously upset when author Stieg Larsson died. No one can write like that man could and I was extremely nervous about someone else picking up the story. I read this book holding my breath the whole time. I liked the story, it definitely scratched that itch and stayed true to the characters. But the writing in some parts was predictable which was one thing Larsson's writing never was. Lagercrantz at one point hits you over the head with foreshadowing which pissed me off so much I remember it bitterly almost 6 months later. Other than that the book is a fantastic read and I will definitely be picking up the next book.<br />
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3+4) Soulless and the Spin off Series Prudence by Gail Carriger <br />
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Soulless I read as recommendation from a coworker and holy hell am I glad I listened. Basically the books are supernatural steampunk. It takes place in England and the first series follows around a woman, Alexia, who was born without a soul. Being soulless doesn't make her a bad person, just very frank. She also had the ability to neutralize any supernatural abilities and the books follow her and her circle of friends on their adventures. The second series follows Alexia's daughter, Rue. Rue has a special ability as well but what she does is when she touches someone who is supernatural she gains their ability until there is physical distance between them. This series is only on their second book which was released this year. Both series are fantastic and they show the different characters from two different perspectives Alexia's and then Rue's. If you're looking for some light fun reading, this is for you. <br />
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5) Abraham Lincoln Vampire Hunter by Seth Grahame-Smith<br />
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When I originally heard of this book I thought it would be completely stupid and I was surprisingly wrong. The writing is engaging and at many points laugh-out-loud funny. And what surprised me the most is that the book was extremely well researched and because of it some things made A LOT of sense to the point where you're like "So this stuff about vampires makes more sense than what the history books say happened. Say what!" Let me be clear, I do not actually believe in vampires. But this is an extremely enjoyable read for anyone who likes a little humor with their supernatural stories. <br />
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6) The Best in the World At What I Have No Idea by Chris Jericho<br />
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That's right Jericho made MY list! Actually all of Jericho's books he has written up until this point, I read this year. But I am lumping them all in together with this one book. Jericho is a modern day renaissance man. For those who do not know, his books are autobiographical and follow his journey to becoming a wrestler/musician. He is someone who refuses to be put in a box or be told what he can and cannot do. His writing made me cry and it really resonated with me when he talks about losing his mom. Most of his writing though is extremely funny. The man is as funny in his writing as he is on the mic. If you enjoy reading wrestling books and you haven't read his books you are doing yourself a disservice. I think Jericho also is the only Canadian author to grace my list this year. <br />
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7) The Golem and the Jinni by Helene Wecker<br />
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This was perhaps my favorite book of the year and it was actually assigned by the guy who read the most last year from my book club so big thumbs up to Mike! If you like stories about old New York, you will LOVE this book. Not only is this about old New York but it focuses on two different groups of people and shows how people from different cultures and life experiences can come together and that sometimes you find help in the least likely of places. I don't want to give anything away but if you love a good story that has a little bit of everything in it, this is your book. I feel like if I say anything else I won't be able to stop myself from giving away the plot. The writing is beautiful. +++ <br />
8) Assassination Vacation by Sarah Vowell<br />
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This is another instance where I have read a couple different titles by this author and I love her work. Sarah Vowell writes what are essentially history books that are hilarious. If you are interested in history but can't get through a slow boring text, Sarah Vowell is the author for you. This particular book goes through all of the US Presidents who have been assassinated. Ms. Vowell goes to all of the historical sites and her experiences there too so if you're looking to check out some of these places you know where they are and if they're worth the effort. <br />
**The only book of her by her that I did not enjoy was Unfamiliar Fishes. I like the subject matter and her but they just didn't connect for me.<br />
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9) She's Come Undone by Wally Lamb<br />
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This was Wally Lamb's first book and I fell in love with the main character. I felt like she was my friend by the end of the book and I wasn't ready to let her go. The book follows the main character from the time she is a little girl to adulthood. We go through life with her and at some points when you know she's making the wrong choices you want to grab and shake the her. And when she is a shitty teenager you kind of want to strangle her. Her triumphs become yours and it's wonderful. Such a great book! Warning: there is some sexual violence so if you're triggered by that I do NOT suggest this book. <br />
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10) The Help by Kathryn Stockett<br />
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I think one of the weirdest things while reading this book was the realization that The Help was supposed to be taking place during my mother's lifetime. Alabama may be 18 hours away from PA but it was operating like an entirely different world. The book is not autobiographical but it does reflect the world at that time. I was disgusted at many points, in tears at others and some things were funny. The book changed perspective from character to character and I truly enjoyed that. The book was so much better than the movie and if you enjoyed the movie pick this book up and you will not be sorry. <br />
<br />Sabrinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00155177315384058655noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6937763536427787784.post-64239695413630194982016-12-14T18:14:00.000-08:002016-12-14T18:14:16.398-08:00I Found Feminists! Post election day I was invited to a Facebook group by a coworker of mine who was surprised that I wasn't in it already. The group is for feminists in my area to talk to other feminists in the coal mining region about anything, politics, something someone said to you, the news or whatever. It is a space to come together, talk, listen and be respected. This is something I have been looking for since I moved back from graduate school. Upon joining the group I noticed several coworkers were in it as well whom I had no idea were rockin the feminist way of life. That alone was something wonderful especially since being an adult, it's a lot easier to make friends with coworkers because you see them 5 days a week. Perfect! Immediate reward for joining the group and since I am a millennial, I enjoy my instant gratification too. The group was very supportive of everyone's feelings and we helped each other from feeling complete despair at Trump's "win".<br />
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I was also luck enough to join before the holiday party! This, this is what I had so desperately wanted. A gathering of feminists where we could share ideas and meet new wonderful people. Not wanting to go alone I asked my new-found-feminist-coworker if she was going and if so if we could go together (I hate showing up places where I know no one by my lonesome). Luckily she has the same dislike and happily agreed. So after work we drove off to get to know each other and fellow feminists better. Settling down into the backroom of a restaurant, the wooden interior quickly reminded me of the restaurant my women's studies peeps and I would lurk in. After a few minutes of being there and doing an oh so fun ice breaker (which wasn't bad surprisingly) I started to feel like a warm blanket fresh out of the dryer was being wrapped loving around me. Both cozy and warm. What was even better was seeing all of these women from different walks of life coming together, presenting their ideas and being met with thoughtful questions, respectful discussions and those moments of "OMG I'M NOT THE ONLY ONE THAT THINKS THAT!?!?!?" That is what I wanted. Real live feminists in the flesh to help me stay sane. Oh and we got to stuff our faces which is a major plus to any social gathering. And we had a gift exchange. Yay presents! <br />
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I met so many AMAZING women that night that I never would have if not for this Facebook community. I feel so weird saying that. Like this must be how couples who meet on Tinder feel when they're asked "So how did you meet?" Only it's asking how you made this kickass friend instead of significant other. "We met through a facebook group". Even my eyes roll. There seems to be some sort of shame left over from AIM days where "geeks" could only make virtual friends. But this got me thinking: isn't this what social media is supposed to do? Allow us to see different sides of people we sorta, kinda know and meet new people who have similar interests as us? Am I in my late 20s now for the first time just using social media the way it was meant to be used? Mayhaps. But hey, it's never too late to learn something new. Sabrinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00155177315384058655noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6937763536427787784.post-4070141378639464242016-12-06T18:16:00.000-08:002016-12-07T06:47:00.803-08:00Adventures in Home Ownership: Animal Edition <p dir="ltr">Years ago my Uncle took off the garage door with the intention of fixing it and putting it back up. My mom got sick and the fixing didn't end up happening. So this spring, I decided that I would assess the damage and see if it was savable. But first I had to FIND the garage door which was harder than you might think. Turned out to be propped against the side of the garage, folded up. When I tried to pull back the door to lay it out I saw something behind it come toddling at me. My first thought was "Oh bunny!!!!" followed very quickly by "Oh shit! POSSUM!!!!!!!!!" I then jumped backwards about 10-15 feet while screaming in a dignified manner. According to google possums do not like moth balls and I, luckily, happen to horde them. (I'm not a little old lady, I just don't like snakes). I then went back up my backyard armed with two boxes of moth balls and tried to do my best impersonation of  a person with good aim.</p>
<p dir="ltr">Several times this summer snakes decided to slither on by me and whenever this happened I screamed and ran away doing high knees. Why? Three reasons. 1) Harder to bite someone who is basically attempting to fly. 2) I cling to the delusion that my neighbors will not think I am some scaredy-cat but rather am enjoying a new, if not annoying, exercise trend.   3) As I found out the last time a snake slithered my way, my screams, scare them and they *sometimes* slither away like "oh hell no lady!" Side note: that snake is the only snake I have ever thought of fondly. I hope the snake is doing well, far, far away from me. </p>
<p dir="ltr">This summer squirrels managed to get into my attic. This is obviously bad news. Now you may be thinking "Hey don't you have three cats that you prattle on about all the time? Why not just release them into the attic and let them get their murder on? *DUN DUN DUN*" Well you my psychotic blood thirsty reader must understand that I have a great fear of my cats getting stuck in the walls, calling out to me with their sad little meows, as I struggle to find them and they die a sad, terrible death. Yes, I am that pet mom. Back off. After again googling I found that there were some things I could do fairly easily to get these suckers to leave. The most interesting idea was to spread predator urine around but seeing as it was July and I as a general rule of thumb don't want urine anywhere but it a toilet or a litter box, I tossed that idea straight away.  Fun fact though, you can buy predator urine on the internet. Makes it easier than going to your local coyote with a jar and saying "fill er up!" The option I did go with was taking apple cider vinegar and soaking rags in it and leaving them around the room. Google, in all of its wisdom, said to allow 48 hours for the squirrels to vacate and check. Now let me tell you, carrying that bucket of apple cider vinegar soaked rags up the stairs to the attic almost made me pass out and vomit at the same time so I can see why the squirrels decided on finding a new summer home. But heads up it worked and was super cheap!</p>
<p dir="ltr">And last but not least this annoying gem. As you should have surmised by now, I live in the woods. Deer wonder through my yard all the time, which I love. They are especially clingy this time of year since it is hunting season and it's Pennsylvania. This proves to me that they are intelligent creatures since they have figured out they can't be shot at around houses. But deer aren't the only large animals that like to peruse my yard and driveway. One morning, as I was about to walk out and go to work, I found my garbage can (which is on wheels due to its size) tipped over and garbage dragged halfway down my yard. Damn bears! Scurrying out to pick up the filth which I had hoped to never see again, I was glad to see the bears were smart enough to stop at the cat litter and left that bag and everything under it alone and in the trash. Since then, I always put the litter trash on top of the rest of it. No more bear mess since that.</p>
<p dir="ltr">That is all for now folks, I hope you have gleamed some slightly useful information and if not hopefully my terror at least gave you a chuckle. </p>
Sabrinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00155177315384058655noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6937763536427787784.post-45441772220611981452016-11-29T20:45:00.001-08:002016-11-29T20:47:20.825-08:00Cairo's Story<br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"> I apologize in advance for the obscene amount of photos. But in my defense Cairo is so adorable I didn't know which to use so I went a little bonkers. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">This is <span style="font-family: inherit;">my do<span style="font-family: inherit;">g, Cairo. He is about <span style="font-family: inherit;">10 year<span style="font-family: inherit;">s ol<span style="font-family: inherit;">d now and obviously he is hella adorable. When I first found my furbaby <span style="font-family: inherit;">it was the sum<span style="font-family: inherit;">mer pr<span style="font-family: inherit;">ior to me starting college. My mother and I were <span style="font-family: inherit;">volunteering at the local humane socie<span style="font-family: inherit;">ty and at that particula<span style="font-family: inherit;">r time they were so over run that a few pups who <span style="font-family: inherit;">were not ready for adoption had to be put out onto the adoption floor with signs <span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">explaining they were not yet ready for adoption. Okay. No problem. So as we are g<span style="font-family: inherit;">oing around w<span style="font-family: inherit;">alking the dogs, my <span style="font-family: inherit;">mom <span style="font-family: inherit;">says "Sabrina come here. Look at this guy." I me<span style="font-family: inherit;">ander o<span style="font-family: inherit;">ver to one of the small ca<span style="font-family: inherit;">ges me<span style="font-family: inherit;">ant for puppies or small breeds<span style="font-family: inherit;">. inside at the back of the ca<span style="font-family: inherit;">ge is this pathetic looking <span style="font-family: inherit;">little dog wh<span style="font-family: inherit;">o won't even make eye cont<span style="font-family: inherit;">act. <span style="font-family: inherit;">My mom points to a sign on his cage that says he had been rescued from an animal testing <span style="font-family: inherit;">facility</span> and was not yet <span style="font-family: inherit;">available</span> for adoption due to a lung infection<span style="font-family: inherit;">. When we look a little close<span style="font-family: inherit;">r at the pup we notice that he has lesions all over his body but specifical<span style="font-family: inherit;">ly ont<span style="font-family: inherit;">op of his <span style="font-family: inherit;">head<span style="font-family: inherit;">. His eyes are also re<span style="font-family: inherit;">d where they should be white and he is <span style="font-family: inherit;">cross-eyed<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">. My mom immediately says that if she had the money she would <span style="font-family: inherit;">adopt him. <span style="font-family: inherit;">My <span style="font-family: inherit;">response</span> is "I do."</span></span> </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span>and we <span style="font-family: inherit;">run off to track down someone to find out how <span style="font-family: inherit;">we get on <span style="font-family: inherit;">a list to adopt <span style="font-family: inherit;">this mutt named Cairo. </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Cairo and his Kermit while Jasper gives them the stink eye (pictured above) </span></h3>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">We<span style="font-family: inherit;">'re then told that we cannot get on a list <span style="font-family: inherit;">to adopt him beca<span style="font-family: inherit;">use they are n<span style="font-family: inherit;">ot so sure he <span style="font-family: inherit;">is going to make it. Upon hearing this my mo<span style="font-family: inherit;">m and I hatch a plan that we will come up to s<span style="font-family: inherit;">ee Cai<span style="font-family: inherit;">ro everyda<span style="font-family: inherit;">y.<span style="font-family: inherit;"> This we hoped <span style="font-family: inherit;">would</span></span></span> accomplish t<span style="font-family: inherit;">hree</span> things. 1) <span style="font-family: inherit;">Having someone come and see him every day w<span style="font-family: inherit;">ould</span> lift his spir<span style="font-family: inherit;">its and we hoped would help him fight off <span style="font-family: inherit;">the lung infection. 2) I<span style="font-family: inherit;">f the staff s<span style="font-family: inherit;">aw</span> us there e<span style="font-family: inherit;">v<span style="font-family: inherit;">ery<span style="font-family: inherit;">day<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">, then we w<span style="font-family: inherit;">ould</span> be more likely<span style="font-family: inherit;"> to be <span style="font-family: inherit;">chosen</span> as his family. 3) When he d<span style="font-family: inherit;">id come up for adoption we <span style="font-family: inherit;">probably be the first<span style="font-family: inherit;"> there</span></span> to <span style="font-family: inherit;">put our names in. Over the weeks<span style="font-family: inherit;"> (maybe a week and a h<span style="font-family: inherit;">alf) we w<span style="font-family: inherit;">atched this scared little pup start <span style="font-family: inherit;">to </span>make eye contact and w<span style="font-family: inherit;">e would find him waiting for us, tail wagging<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"> upon visual confirmation</span>. Pure love. </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">On one of our many walks. </span></h4>
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Sure enough when the day he came up for adoption came we were first on that list. We were told within a week that he was officially ours and we just had to wait until his kennel cough went away. That same week is the week that my dad died suddenly due to a heart attack caused by a car accident. The only normal remaining route that week was going to see this dog. The day after my dad's funeral Cairo came home. I still remember I got home after my mom had picked him up and he was running around I <i>his </i>yard, enjoying life. Cairo has had some special needs over the years, mainly he has food allergies so you have to be careful what you give him. Also he has separation anxiety, which caused him to eat a chunk of my old apartment door while my roommate and I were at work. The next day I took him to the vet and Cairo went on doggie prozac. Thankfully I have been able to wean him off of them, which was the goal. Cairo's skin lesions did eventually heal up, although it took years, specifically the ones on his head. Through research, I found that what he was subjected to primarily was eye drop tests. Basically they would take this puppy, fasten his head to hold him still (creating the lesions) and then hold his eyes open and drop liquid in them. This caused the redness and perhaps the cross-eyed look of his. Still thinking about that happening to my Cairo makes me want to cry. My mom told me from day one we were not to pity him, it wouldn't help him. Over the years the redness has almost entirely left his eyes. </div>
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For experiencing such cruelty in the beginning of his life, Cairo is such a ball of love. He loves people. All he wants is love and attention (okay and your food). He still shows signs of the abuse. When you call him over to you sometimes he cowers. It is the most pathetic thing and it is heart wrenching. Whenever this happens I try and use my sweet voice and sure enough his little piggy tail (the thing is basically a whip) starts wagging and tentatively his head comes up. But most of the time he is the BOUNCIEST love of all. He loves snuggling right up against you under the covers but he will not put his head by you. Cairo rules dictate you must deal with his dog butt. A small price to pay if you are constantly cold like I am and love puppy snuggles. I've always been a big fan of adopting animals from shelters. Most haven't experienced the trauma Cairo has but what I hope his story illustrates is, even dogs who have been abused still have so much love to give and should not be feared. Their hearts have be broken and they just need your love to help heal them. </div>
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"> </span></span></span></span> </span></span></span></span></span></span></span> </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span> </span></span></span> </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span>Sabrinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00155177315384058655noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6937763536427787784.post-22615110018230088572016-11-14T22:01:00.001-08:002016-11-15T14:57:34.714-08:00What Else Can Be Said: Election 2016<p dir="ltr">After a week almost now of digesting that our new President is someone who enjoys "grabbing [women] by the pussy" I feel as though there is little left to be said on the matter. I considered not writing about this matter at all because I am not sure there is anything I uniquely contribute to this conversation, but I decided it would be slight to what my original purpose for this blog was for, a place for my feminist roar. And perhaps, you my dear reader, are a big Trump supporter and I am the only voice you know that reflects what so many are feeling in our country now. In not writing about the election results I may be doing a disservice, but most likely, I am just tooting my own horn. But either way, here it is.</p>
<p dir="ltr">I was, and am, with Her. I've loved and looked up to Hillary Clinton since I was a little girl. She put up a good fight and indeed, at the time of this writing, won the popular vote with ever growing numbers. However, the electoral college, which we have to thank for George W. Bush, has seemingly delivered us Donald Trump. Since learning of the electoral college in high school I have been deeply against it. Much like my teachers I believe that it has long out lived its purpose. Most of the United States population who were eligible to vote when it was originally created were illiterate and news was not an easy thing to come by in a timely manner. So having electorates made sense. Now also mind you these people, being  that they were educated most likely were of higher classes as well. Fast forward to modern times, we now have a population that is the most well educated the world has ever seen. And these educated people, having taken civics or US history know of the electoral college and I deeply believe that is why only about half the eligible voters in this country vote, because the other half thinks their votes do not matter. Also this whole "well the electoral college was made because if we didn't have it then cities like New York and L.A. would basically pick our next president" is a bunch of hoo ha. One, I have NEVER heard this theory mentioned until Trump won the electoral college. What I believe it stems from is the fear from small states that their votes wouldn't matter as much as compared to larger ones when our government was forming. At the time, small states were ones like Delaware and the large states were ones like PA and New York. However, in the electoral college small states still have a lesser number of votes. Any nation that fails to grow and change with the times does eventually fall. Our founding fathers knew that which is why they allowed for amendments to the constitution. I love America. I do not wish to see her dismantled.</p>
<p dir="ltr">Onto the protests....</p>
<p dir="ltr">Protesting is a right that is guaranteed to us and is something that sets us apart from many other nations. I am referring to PROTESTS not riots. Rioting and violence is no way to get a point across. The message is actually completely lost in rioting. Also I am not a fan of desecrating the flag or setting stuff on fire. Once fire is in the equation some people tend to get crazy. And desecrating the flag is not only in poor taste, but the flag represents everyone who has died for your freedom, for those who never receive their loved one home but merely that piece of cloth. Their is no need to dishonor them. Whatever point you are trying to make can be made better by some banner, t-shirt or catchy phrase.</p>
<p dir="ltr">Those protesting are not crybabies. They are here to show solidarity with those who have been targeted in this election; mainly, people of color, women, LGBTQ persons, disabled persons and prisoners of war. The protests are also a strong warning to president elect Trump and Mike Pense that we will be watching you. We are not afraid. And we will fight you ever step of the way and we are prepared to fight. We are a generation that had to sit through eight years of George W. Bush, unable to do anything due to our age(and God how do I miss him now). Millennials voted Hillary pretty straight across the board. For once, I am proud to say I am part of that generation. </p>
<p dir="ltr">Trump supporters are not all racist, sexist, homophobic dumb dumbs. Some are lifelong republicans that refuse to break party lines, some hated Hillary and decided not to vote third party (oh how I wish you had), maybe you were worried they were coming for your guns or maybe you were slammed with false news articles. As for anyone reading the news please, please fact check. Mainly the only way you could get something straight this election was if you watched the full interviews or debates of anyone talking. NOT CLIPS. Clips on both sides were spliced together. This was the year of misinformation if nothing else. The big thing that upsets all the people who fall into the categories of people of color, women, LGBTQ persons, disabled persons ect thar are out protesting, or in need of emotional support, is not so much that someone they don't like will be president. It's not even that we think you are racist, sexist, homophobic jerks. It's that for our friends, family members and neighbors Trump and Pence's stances on those issues wasn't a breaking point for you. Someone who brags about sexually assaulting women didn't make you stand up and say "No. You do not get my vote." Someone who is okay with conversion therapy and discriminating against LGBTQ persons in general you did not stand up and say "No. You do not have my vote."  Someone who thinks it is okay to discriminate based on race and religion you didn't say "No. You do not have my vote." Someone who openly mocks the disabled you did not say "No. You do not have my vote." What you said was "Well I don't agree with all of his views." No one agrees with all of anyone's views so thank you for stating the obvious. What the issue we have is, the above mentioned things and then some, did not cross a line for you. Perhaps because it wasn't directed at someone you know, yet. But the reason there is now a spike in hate crime in this country is because <u>of</u> you not standing up and saying "No! You do not have my vote." Instead you said, none of this crosses a line for me and is therefore, in some way, acceptable. And in the process sent a clear message to those that harbor those racist, sexist, homophobic beliefs: This behavior and these beliefs are acceptable. I know you didn't mean for that to be the message. I know you are probably furious with me as you read this (if you have made it this far). And I know you probably are denying all of this. But it is what it is. This is my opinion. I do not love you any less. My heart just hurts. It hurts as I think of all those who are being attacked, of those who are now living in fear and for America. And while I believe we as a nation will "survive" a Trump presidency, I worry about those Americans who won't. </p>
Sabrinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00155177315384058655noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6937763536427787784.post-32547032124833700132016-11-08T18:33:00.001-08:002016-11-08T18:34:53.631-08:00My Favorite Suffragette and Hero, Alice Paul<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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On this election day many people have gone to the grave of Susan B. Anthony. History attributes women's right to vote to her. Anthony died well before women won the right to vote, and while she paved the way and the suffragette's who followed after her looked up to her, it was not she who pressured Woodrow Wilson into signing the 19th amendment.<br />
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Alice Paul was born and raised a Quaker and as such she did
not seek out credit for the work she had done. Her religious values are
perhaps what allows history to forget her. And while she may not have
cared if her name was remembered, I sure do. <br />
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One thing also that Alice Paul stood for that her predecessors did not was ALL women having the right to vote, no matter the color of their skin. Many of the suffragettes that came before her, as well as her contemporaries, were not concerned with the rights of anyone whose skin did not match the color of the snow. Alice Paul, quite frankly is my hero. When I worked at the Connecticut Women's Hall of Fame, of which Ms. Paul is a member, her portrait hung over my desk and every time I gazed up with her my heart would swell with pride. Not all white suffragists cared only about their race and it is an extremely important message that people get and understand that it wasn't until the movement was headed by women who saw all women as people, no matter what the color of their skin was or what religion they followed, that women FINALLY won the right to vote. Feminists who do not subscribe to that notion can not win any battles because they are hypocrites and held everyone back.<br />
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When you read of suffragettes being imprisoned, beaten and going on hunger strikes, that was Alice Paul and her suffragettes. They endured force feedings and the opposition to their movement even tried to have Alice Paul committed to a mental institution. The doctor that examined her when asked if she was insane said the historic quote, which you probably never knew had anything to do with Ms. Paul was a product of their attempt:<br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><i><b> “Courage in women is often mistaken for insanity.”</b></i></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: small;">It wasn't long after that quote went, what could be considered now as "viral", that the 19th amendment was signed.</span><i><b><br /></b></i></span><br />
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Alice Paul also didn't stop fighting for women and our rights once the 19th amendment was passed. She worked on the Equal Rights Amendment as well. The amendment reads “Equality of rights under the law shall not be
denied or abridged by the United States or by any state on account of
sex." We all owe her so much and while she died back in the 1970s, I think the least we can do is honor her by voting in every election. If you would like to learn more about Alice Paul and the suffragist movement I highly recommend watching <b><i>Iron Jawed Angels. </i></b>And checking out Alice Paul's section of the <a href="http://www.cwhf.org/inductees/reformers/alice-paul/#.WCKHhH9f3IU">Connecticut Women's Hall Of Fame</a>. <br />
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<br />Sabrinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00155177315384058655noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6937763536427787784.post-87444068900336246372016-11-06T18:19:00.000-08:002016-11-06T18:19:52.822-08:00Surviving NY Comic Con<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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As a semi veteran of the NY Comic Con I wanted to share my survival tips for those who are going to the con for the first time or who are looking to do it on the cheap.<br />
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Prior to the con I highly suggest getting a backpack that has a chair that can fold out. You will be waiting outside and this will SAVE your legs/feet and allow you to do more throughout the day. Also pack food and bring a water bottle. Make sure you have snacks (trail mix and apples are a favorite of mine) and make sandwiches that you don't need to keep cool all day. PB&J all the way! I cannot stress how much this will save you on money and time. Water is around $4-$5 a dinky bottle. Forget that! Bring a refillable water bottle because by all the bathrooms there are water fountains. Now if that is what water costs you can imagine how much the food costs. A slice of pizza will make you cry unless you are being bank rolled by Bill Gates in which case buy a whole tray and share it with me. I also tend to pack more food than what I think I might need because I would rather go home with an extra sandwich than murder someone in a hangry moment.<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Here I am as a very tired Hermione. </td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"></td></tr>
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Now when you are choosing your foot wear choose CAREFULLY!!! I cannot stress this enough. Do not buy new shoes without stretching them out. This is not a drill, you will want to die. Now if you are cosplaying there is little that can be done based on what character you have chosen. I always go with someone I know has sensible foot wear because I see so many ladies with heels on who half way through the day their legs are shaking. That is just not the experience I want. Last year I was Kaylee from Firefly and this year I was Hermione from Harry Potter. If you are going to be wearing heels pop those bad boys in your bag until your about to hit the floor. You do not need to navigate NYC with them on as well. Do not worry about looking silly or weird wearing sneakers with your cosplay, you're dressed as Harley Quinn. Someone already thinks you're deranged. I would also suggest getting those shoe inserts and if you are going for multiple days perhaps do not cosplay everyday especially if this is your first con.<br />
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The day of con if you want to see any panels, get there no later than 630am. Now Sabrina, they don't even start letting people into the building until 8 or 9 am depending on the day and then the con doesn't actually open until 10am so why should I get there so damn early? Well my dears if you want to see a panel suck it up buttercup. Some of the panels are ticketed. You will not know which ones until you show up that day. You then have to sit in line for them and they do sell out. And those freebees you see people with? If you want those you had better hit the show room floor EARLY! You go to the right booths and you get free totes, backpacks, tshirts, pins, books, food, makeup ect. There is no reason that you should be walking out of this con without some free swag. You will also want to check the weather, bring a collapsible umbrella, gloves, hat and an appropriate jacket. That backpack with a built in seat also comes in handy if it rains. You can still sit down for those hours.<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgBCFR6CsbqvabWRSnMII-sCiZOIE3X6ueLLuzWu3c2_2b6q_0FBgvnBBrg4wv_OUEIGqr6qLkH6kxfiNCpDmPz-b2lo-a2FudiKRx2jCprT0_ANqt4NJX3TpYa5QudmHNa4Di1xnvIXig/s1600/14567334_943750005737_4275644260156708511_o.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgBCFR6CsbqvabWRSnMII-sCiZOIE3X6ueLLuzWu3c2_2b6q_0FBgvnBBrg4wv_OUEIGqr6qLkH6kxfiNCpDmPz-b2lo-a2FudiKRx2jCprT0_ANqt4NJX3TpYa5QudmHNa4Di1xnvIXig/s320/14567334_943750005737_4275644260156708511_o.jpg" width="305" /></a> For panels that are not ticketed, you will want to show up about an hour prior to it starting to get in line. I am not joking. If the person at the door offers to let you sit in on the panel that is going on, do that. You'll probably see a cool panel that you never would have and you either already have or will have access to gaining a better seat for your panel. If there is someone on the panel who isn't doing an autographing session, head up to the front once the panel is over, they are usually super awesome about talking with fans, signing autographs and taking pictures. This past con I met Captain Planet and Ed Asner that way. That was also free.<br />
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Always check the schedule the week of Con and figure out what panels you want to go to and see when you have open pockets of time to go to the show floor or artists alley or check out the cosplayers. There should never be a moment where you are bored. You will be tired to the point where when you sit down you start to fall asleep but never board. Planning is a very important aspect of con. Also understand that people are going to bump into you and you're going to bump into them. Spaces get packed throughout the day, specifically the show room. The floor is HUGE. It usually takes me two days to cover it all. And if you are a wrestling fan they usually have about 5 wrestlers scattered throughout the show room (although usually they're on the right side of the floor area away from the Block but not always). You can get your picture taken and an autograph with them, for a price. This year I met the King and saw Ric Flair, Hacksaw, Million Dollar Man, Mick Foley, Noelle Foley, Animal and Jimmy Hart. Mick Foley was there two years ago too but he is the only reoccurring one I have seen.<br />
<br />
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Overall, stay hydrated and be prepared to sit in some lines. It'll all be worth it though in the end, I promise. I would also recommend bringing a portable game system or a book for when you're sitting in said lines. I read three books this past Con alone. I hope this list helps and if you have any further questions please don't be afraid to ask in the comments! Sabrinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00155177315384058655noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6937763536427787784.post-34812587751775087662016-10-26T20:53:00.004-07:002016-11-01T07:45:23.821-07:00My Mom's Eulogy <p dir="ltr">I was asked about a year ago if I wouldn't mind sharing my mom's eulogy. I, of course, took my sweet time with this request. I thought about editing this for many reasons. One being that it is written to be spoken, not read. And the bigger reason, it still feels unfinished. But I understand that I could write and rewrite this for the rest of my life and it would never seem finished. I could never capture the person my mother was with words and so I have left it as is. Written the week after my mother died, it is raw and real. Here it is:<br></p>
<p dir="ltr">Since they told me that my mom was dying I've been trying to find the right words to even come close to describing the kind of person my mother was and it hasn't been easy. There just doesn't seem to be words to accurately describe the woman who not only brought me into this world, but supported me through every decision I made, even when those decisions were about her health. She nursed me through every heartache, tucked me in at night and always made sure that I KNEW I was unconditionally loved. And that's just some of what she has done for me. And while I don't believe there are words to really do my mom justice, I'm going to try my best to find them. I owe her at least that much.<br>
My mom wasn't just a great mom, she was a wonderful friend. She never allowed anyone to suffer a hardship by themselves. If there was something she could do to help, she would. Thinking back to when I was in high school, there were always people at our house. My friends knew that it was a safe place for them to come, and it's no wonder that so many of my friends ended up calling her "mom" as well.<br>
And no one can talk about my mom without mentioning how much she loved animals. She not only rescued animals but she often times rescued ones that nobody else wanted. Either because they were too old or had been abused and needed extra love to get them back to a place where they could trust people again.<br>
My mom's biggest fear, other than death, when she was diagnosed was that everyone would forget about her. That no one would come see her in the hospital and that she would fade out of existence without anyone ever noticing. I am very pleased to say that wasn't the case. Somedays my mom had more visitors than she knew what to do with. She was so very touched to just have people come by and sit and talk with her. Those visits allowed her to to keep on living even when her body was dying. Mom was still cognitive at the end and in her last days, although her responses were difficult and at times impossible for her to make she was still able to understand everything. So my mom was able to leave this world knowing how much she's loved, which not many people get. And I want to thank everyone who come to talk to her while she was ill and for all the phone calls and letters that were sent to her. She cherished everyone of them and everyone of us.<br>
My mom had a lot of love to give and I am so lucky that I was the recipient of most of it. It's that I'm going to miss the most. Even the small things like her talking to me on the phone at 3am as I drove to and from Connecticut. Her constantly wanting to me <font color ="#000000">l</font>er her know I had arrived safely when on a trip and that I made it back home safe. I still can't imagine a future without her. I honestly won the lottery when it came to moms because I couldn't have had a better one. In her final days I was able to tell her how proud I am to be her daughter. Children often hear from our parents that they're proud of us but we rarely think to tell them that. And I am so glad I got to spend the time with her that I did. Even though I'll always feel it was cut far too short. </p>
Sabrinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00155177315384058655noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6937763536427787784.post-69198605807535274252016-10-18T19:42:00.001-07:002016-10-18T19:42:50.365-07:00Twenty Nine for 29Hello my neglected blog of mine! I'm not big on New Years Resolutions but I am a fan of something my friend Stef turned me onto, goals based on how old you are. This past week I turned 29 so this year as the title suggests I came up with 29 goals for myself to accomplish by the time I am 30. One of the items on this list was to blog again regularly (and perhaps even edit what I have written before posting it*gasp*). This being said I thought the best way to kick off my return to #poundsign would be to give you my list and share this fun idea with you. The goals can be anything big or small as you will see.<br />
<br />
Here is my 29 for 29.<br />
<br />
1) Read 50 books in one year<br />
2) Learn sign language<br />
3) Blog again<br />
4) Plant a garden<br />
5) Volunteer more often<br />
6) Do the Rocky Run<br />
7) Complete at least 3 Penn Foster Programs<br />
8) Stop picking at the skin around my fingers<br />
9) Improve credit score<br />
10) Win competitive book club (you can refer to an earlier blog post for what a competitive book club is)<br />
11) Get another tattoo<br />
12) Do a Christmas or Turkey run<br />
13) Visit Jasmine<br />
14) Visit Deanna<br />
15) Visit Amy<br />
16) Get a proper garage door<br />
17) Keep my car clean<br />
18) Do yoga at least 5 times a week<br />
19) Clean out garage<br />
20) Get the pool working<br />
21) Get back into theatre<br />
22) Do at least 10 runs<br />
23) Complete all Hogwarts Running Club runs to get a Perfect Perfect Pin<br />
24) Finish my library<br />
25) Fix up the patio<br />
26) Do a cross country road trip<br />
27) Learn to shoot a gun<br />
28) Be more responsible with money <br />
29) Be a better friend<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
So that's how you do it! I've been doing these lists since I was 26 and I always enjoy it, even if I don't complete everything on this list. I usually do at least half. It's nice to look back at a list of things you accomplished in a year and see also how you have changed. Sometimes half way through the year I don't even want to do something that is on the list anymore and that's okay. We change as people and it's neat to see that. Don't worry if your list is vastly different from mine, it should be! No
two lists should match. If you decide to go ahead with this idea
yourself please let me know if this was something you enjoyed. Give yourself perhaps a month once you're into your mid twenties to
come up with these ideas and try to realistic and have fun with it!<br />
Sabrinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00155177315384058655noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6937763536427787784.post-5373795318840174602016-06-06T15:56:00.003-07:002016-06-06T15:56:39.381-07:00The Sanctity of FriendshipAs we come into adulthood it becomes more difficult to make and maintain friendships. In an effort to increase communication between myself and a few friends who live across the country, we have started mailing each other hand written letters. I first got the idea when one of my best chums did a six month stint in Wisconsin on an organic farm for what I call an artistanship because I cannot remember the correct term for what she won. These are coveted spots where artists get to work on their crafts which is wonderful, however, she was on a farm in the middle of Wisconsin and cell phone reception was what you would expect. Thus we dusted off the old quills and inkwells and went to work! The joy one gets when they receive a piece of mail that is not a bill and or junk asking you to join AARP when you're in your 20s. (Whomever does their mailing lists should really consider entering another line of work) is exactly like I remember as a child. I enjoyed writing and receiving these letter so much and found it was a great way to keep in contact with someone who was not in your time zone I decided to add to my writing circle. I now have two different friends that I exchange letters with and I get overjoyed when I see one in my mailbox! Emails are never this exciting. It's great getting to laugh aloud while reading. My one friend, let's call her Katie because Katie is her name, when I first proposed this idea thought that I was bat shit insane but being Katie was up for this bizarre request. It did not take long before she agreed that this was a wonderful idea and even greater her husband is now jealous that she receives such fun mail! Success! I also feel like we are doing our patriotic duty by keeping the postal service in business.<br />
<br />
On writing my latest letter to Katie, which I popped in the mail today -Katie this is your que that if you are reading this you must now stop until you read the letter!!!- that I remembered a funny story to write to her and thus started the idea for this blog post. I stopped by a friend's house and they asked me to try some this tea. I love tea but by the way he offered this tea I was mildly concerned: "Sabrina you must try this tea, if you do not like it I will give you a new tea of your choosing but first you must try this" I didn't really agree because it was clear there was little way out of this tea-dicament so I just accepted my fate- hoping that he loved it so much that he felt all should try. But something in his voice told me that was not going to be the case. As the mug was placed before me it was explained that it was a "savory" tea and that's when I looked to my other friend whom I remember warning me of this filth. I sniffed the aroma coming off of the curious tea and it smelled of celery. "I like celery" I thought "Perhaps it's just not something all gravitate towards". That's when I took a big mouth full of what tasted precisely like boiled dirt. At this I began questioning my choices in friends-these two are far too close to my own evilness. I am totally that person that when I taste something gross I tell everyone around me "taste this!". Case in point, when I came back from Australia I brought back Vegemite for my loved ones to try, I even brought it to the family reunion. That's what family is for after all, making someone suffer as you have. No? That's just mine? Moving on. I continued to drink the boiled dirt aka crushed up broccoli, cilantro, carrot, celery and a bunch of other earthy veggies that have no business being in tea. I was convinced that something that tasted like that had to be good for you right? About halfway through the tea they also said "Oh that tea also gives you terrible gas". Thank you friends for telling me this now. I decided at that point, healthy or not, I was not going to knock us all out with the contents of my butt. Shortly thereafter I said my adieu and wondered what I had done to wrong them so.<br />
<br />
This brings me to another story of tea-rrible times. A former roommate of mine bought a box of tea from the Christmas tree shops. The box was completely written in Chinese so she didn't really know what she was getting but $1 for a box of tea is a pretty good deal especially for a broke graduate student tea addict. A few days later she began to get sick so she made herself some of this tea to help make her feel better. Everyone knows tea=miracle cure. The sicker she felt the more tea she drank. Well after a few days of her diarrhea getting increasingly worse she finally realized the only new element was this tea. Time for Google. Luckily her laptop could travel with her to the toilet where she had been living for the past 48 hours. And once she typed in the tea the word "laxative" appeared on the screen. This made her the first person to use tea as a weight loss system, albeit against her will.<br />
<br />
My dear readers if you are still with me after what started out as a great way to communicate with friends and then literally ended up in the shitter I appreciate you. For those who abandoned this post they'll get theirs. They'll never know now to avoid heavily discounted tea. The deal is far too good to be true friends. These folks have now doomed their intestinal tracks because they would not read my tea-rrifc blog post. Just goes to show you can't save them all. <br />
<br />
<br />
Sabrinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00155177315384058655noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6937763536427787784.post-136309350727723252016-04-21T10:58:00.005-07:002016-04-21T19:17:35.698-07:00We Lost the 9th Wonder of The World<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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After yesterday’s post I was deeply shocked that the first
thing I saw when I woke up this morning was one of my colleagues asking me if I
was going to come into work today following the news of Chyna’s death. I
quickly checked her Instagram, which I mildly stalk, and was devastated that
she had indeed passed. At this point they are not sure what happened and I will
not speculate. I only hope that she died peacefully and knew on some level that
she was loved by many. I also did go into work by the way. </div>
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<br></div>
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I think the one word that sums up my feelings on Chyna’s
death is anger. She deserved so much more recognition than she got from the WWE
for everything she contributed. I am glad that Stephanie McMahon tweeted about
her death and called her a pioneer. Chyna spent so much of her life in
recent years trying to mend fences with the WWE, be acknowledged by them and inducted
into the Hall of Fame. It seems bitter sweet that they are only now acknowledging
her contributions and star power. I hope that they induct her into the Hall of
Fame in 2017. I feel like I may riot otherwise.<br>
<br>
Chyna pictured below with her Women's Championship belt and below that she is pictured with the WWE IC Championship. She was the first, and so far the only, woman to ever hold that belt. <br>
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What Culture has done a fantastic job paying tribute to her
and her career today and I will include the link to their video <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P_NKURZ7OQs">Thank You Chyna</a> because they say it all
so perfectly.<a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P_NKURZ7OQs"></a> I am so beyond blessed that I was able to meet her when I did. Chyna
had an incredible influence on my life and dazzled me with how strong women
could be. There will never be another Chyna. #ChynaHallofFame2017<br>
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Sabrinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00155177315384058655noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6937763536427787784.post-80533872201920383562016-04-20T10:01:00.000-07:002016-04-20T11:44:27.413-07:00This Feminist's Guilty Pleasure<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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I thought to shake off my rust in blogging I'd return to the root of why I started blogging; feminism. This led me to thinking about my guilty pleasure as a feminist. I think it is time that I confess to the masses, I LOVE Pro-wrestling, specifically WWE's brand. This has always shocked everyone who has ever known me. And while there are some serious black spots on WWE's history, as far as their treatment and use of female talent goes, I cannot help but love the overall product just the same. And I was overjoyed when they announced at Wrestlemaina that they are returning back to the Women's Championship and have retired the Diva's championship. The women they have wrestling today, for the most part, are seriously badass wrestlers NOT the atrocious "we never learned how to wrestle or never watched it growing up" divas we had been subjected to for almost a decade (With a few exceptions like Natalya who struggled through having matches with opponents who didn't know what they were doing).<br />
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Thankfully women like her soldiered through and saved the division. Even the Bella Twins learned how to wrestle properly. And that is why that ridiculous Brat's accessory of a belt had to be replaced by one that looks respectable. Pictured above is Natalya with the old Women's Championship and the Diva's belt- I'm not kidding. That's the Diva belt. But let me backtrack a little.
<br />
<br />
Growing up I wanted to be one of four women, Xena Warrior Princess, Cher,
Buffy and Chyna. Now two of those women are fictional and have aspects of
superhuman abilities. And well, I also cannot sing. So by process of elimination
I realized I could aim to be like Chyna who during the Attitude Era of wrestling
was seriously paving the way for women in wrestling. She held the
Intercontential Championship and was in the Royal Rumble. She fought the guys
and looked like she could do some serious damage. I was in awe of this real
life Xena. I bought her fitness VHS with the hopes of having some serious guns
like her (Side note: Chyna Fitness is probably still the best workout I have
ever had in my life with kickboxing being a close second). Chyna’s time was cut
short in the WWE by personal issues, bad things happen when your live in
boyfriend starts dating and then marries the boss daughter. And from there
Chyna wound up on celebrity rehab, porn and being abused by fellow wrestler
X-poc(whom I always disliked and this gave me proof positive that he is indeed
an a-hole). All of that effectively broke my fangirl heart. I met Chyna a few
months ago at an autograph signing. I am a 28 year old woman and I nearly burst
into tears when I met her because meeting ones idols is INTENSE. I managed not
to cry but could barely spoke for fear of embarrassing myself. How do you tell
someone “OMG I WANTED TO BE YOU!?!?” without sounding like an insane person as
an adult? You can’t. I will say that she was incredibly nice, and she signed my
book on the outside and the inside and took a picture with me. And when I say she was nice, I mean she signed my book that was from her time with the WWE and she has very negative feeling towards the company for their treatment of her when she was let go and after. She was also so much
smaller than I thought she would be. I have come to find that wrestlers usually
are. I definitely just see them as larger than life and so meeting them is so
weird size wise. <br />
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With Chyna gone there were still a variety of badass such as Jacqueline,
Ivory, Trish, Lita, Molly Holly and Victoria who kept the womens division
interesting and provided fantastic matches on the level of their male
counterparts. Then something happened. These women started retiring or were let
go from the company and the women that replaced them were not trained wrestlers. They
were simply there to be sexy and when they got into the ring it was <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">painful</i> to watch. Women's wrestling hit a
serious decline and during this period I really stopped watching because even
the woman who was left, Lita, what they turned her career into was sickening
to me(ring side TA-no wrestling). I’d still catch matches and watch the big
PPVs, the men in the WWE were still highly entertaining (most of the time) with talents like John Cena, Randy Ortin, Daniel Bryan, Y2J, Edge, Booker T, Kane,
Taker, HHH, CM Punk, Dolph Ziggler and Wade Barret just to name a few. I am
actually wearing a John Cena shirt as I write this and to all the Cena haters
out there, I got two words for ya: SUCK IT. Those 5 moves of doom are
entertaining as hell. Moving on. <br />
We have since seen a revamping of the women's division due to NXT and perhaps
HHH and Stephanie, although I am not 100% sure on that. Stephanie was a former
Women’s Champion herself and I always enjoyed it when she would wrestle and
still do. She’s literally a billionaire and did not need to learn how to
wrestle but she did and in my opinion she does it well. Her brother Shane O’Mac
even with 10 years of ring rust is still one of my favorites to watch in the
ring. I don’t know if it’s that little dance/skip he does down to the ring or
the crazy ass shit he is willing to do (see match with Kurt Angle where he is
thrown through glass and almost legitimately breaks his neck-it was supposed to
be made of sugar glass but someone messed up and put the real deal there and
Shane nearly died as a result especially since he insisted on being suplexed
through until the real Plexiglas broke #badass). I also believe the bring about
of the PG era helped women's wrestling. It’s not PG to have a sex celebration,
bra and panties matches or whatever other disgusting ideas were thought up.
Another side note: when I watched wrestling as a kid, I would do so with my Dad.
Ever watch a bra and panties match with your Dad when you’re 13? No? Well I
have. It wasn’t exactly a bonding moment. More like neither of us knew what to
do and it was awkward as hell. Thanks again Vince, I’ll be sending you my
therapy bill. Also is it any wonder that my Dad did not want me to be a
pro-wrestler after that? <br />
I saw my first live event when I was 17. I went with a car full of my guy
friends and I will never forget it for a few reasons. 1. The backseat did not
have any seat belts so it was decided that I would sit in the middle with the
two fattest guys(who were very overweight) so that if we crashed hopefully I
would be so squished I wouldn’t fly out the front window and I’d have padding
on either side of me. I don’t think that would have worked for the record, but I
didn’t care. I was about to see the WWE live! A little life threatening danger was deemed totally worth it. I was about to have a dream come true. 2. We got to the arena in
about 20 minutes because we were running late- due to one of the guys for the
record- the arena was 45 mins away if you went the speed limit. I know I am
lucky to be writing this story right now. The arena was in Binghamton NY, Brooms
County Arena. I have been to several shows since then and at different arenas
and I will say nothing compares to the energy that I saw that night. I remember
when Kane’s pyro hit and I felt the heat of it all the way up in the
nosebleeds. Pure magic. <br />
In college I actually found one woman who was a fan as well and who shared my
Hardy boyz love. #besttagteamever! I have since met them and they are as nice,
if not nicer than I thought they would be. One of the sad things for me was
during the Attitude Era it was definitely the golden age of tag teams, which means it declined with the women's division. We saw
things that had never been done before and the talent was off the charts. TLC
matches baby! I haven’t seen a decent TLC match in I can’t remember how long. But
honestly how can you compete with that stuff? Unless you are Y2J and Chris
Benoit…and then there’s that. Benoit. <br />
I was a HUGE Benoit fan. His in ring ability was mind blowing. The
Wrestlemaina when both he and Eddy won titles made me cry and was such a
wonderful moment. That’s the Benoit I knew as a fan. Then the news broke that
he had killed his wife, son and himself. My heart stopped. Too many concussions
and the very serious effect they have on the human brain took his sanity along with all of their lives. The
WWE banned the use of his name and all of his matches were hidden away. I
understood not referencing him but taking away his matches I did not agree with
because the wrestlers he worked with didn’t deserve that. Y2J specifically had
some of the best matches of his career with Benoit and I wanted to be able to
see them damn it. I had them on VHS thankfully and now the WWE has made them available
again on the Network. By the way if you have the Network, watch Swerved. You
won’t regret it. I don’t think he should ever be inducted into the Hall of
Fame. I agree to with Chris Jericho’s stance on this. Fantastic wrestler but
what he did at the end of his life does disqualify him and would taint the
Hall. It’s also unfortunate that his wife Nancy, who was in the wrestling
business, isn’t talked about either even though it’s not her fault her husband
murdered her. <br />
Wrestling is often very problematic on issues of race, gender, sexuality and
religion. I know this. I’ve seen it. I’ve touched on some of it -barely- here. Has some
headway been made? Yes. Do they still have a long way to go? Give me a Hell
Yeah! But nothing is perfect and the problems I see in wrestling I see in other
entertainment like tv shows, movies and books. Remember WWE is basically a soap
opera with body slams. There are story lines and yes the results and matches
are “rigged” no one, except small children believes it is real in that manner.
But what they inflict on their bodies is very real and unlike other sports (yes
I am calling it a sport-bite me) you can see a much wider population
represented. There is almost someone for everyone to relate to. And what some of these people can do with their bodies is literally beautiful-the high flying moves that some superstars do are beyond graceful. Beautiful is the only way I can even think to describe it.<br />
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I plan on writing several more blogs on wrestling and feminism but I wanted
to give a general background and I apologize because I know this is all over
the place so if you’ve made it this far thank you. I think that writing about
wrestling as a fan who is also a feminist is important because it isn’t
something I have seen before. And if you are a feminist who is curious check
out matches that have Natalya, Charlotte, Sasha, Becky Lynch, Naomi and Tamina in
them for current. Or for old school Chyna, Jackie, Ivory and Molly Holly. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Serious BAMF. Wrestling is my guilty pleasure, always has been. Fan girl out!<br />
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Sabrinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00155177315384058655noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6937763536427787784.post-64653609167625017892015-12-20T13:22:00.002-08:002016-01-28T09:48:15.915-08:00The Truth in the IllusionWhen we lose someone, someone we truly love, we may find ourselves thinking that they couldn't have possibly existed. That's what my mind did about a month after my mother died. The loss was too great. She must have been a fantasy I thought up. I would remind myself that obviously wasn't true since I was born; I had to have a mother. In the end, I recognized what I was doing as a coping mechanism, my mind couldn't handle the lost therefore, it tried to remove it. It's a very strange feeling. One that I dismissed quickly because losing my memories of my Mom would be losing her again. She deserves to be remembered. Perhaps it is a testament to how wonderful she was that my mind just couldn't bear to remember. I am not alone in this. I've read of other people having the same sort of fog. My advise to those who suffer the same, is to fight it. Hang onto the memory of them. Do not let go of them. Forgetting may save pain at first, but in the long run you will better off for remembering.<br />
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Last night I had a dream that my mother was alive. She came where ever I was and she looked like she did before she got sick. I said to her "Mom you're dead." She said " What are you talking about?" I decided to go with it, to enjoy my dream time with her. To follow the illusion, even though I knew it was a dream. <br />
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The Christmas after my Dad died I begged my Mom to not do Christmas. She wouldn't listen. It proceeded as normal. Looking back I am glad she did that. Tried to keep it normal for me, so not to ruin my future holidays any more than they were. I am trying to do Christmas but the magic is gone. "As long as you have a Mother and Father, there will always be a Santa Claus." my Mother would tell me as a child when I'd ask about Santa's existence. It's the same answer her mother gave her when she would ask. That answer convinced me that there obviously must be a Santa because you always have parents. Well I am 28 now and Santa, along with my parents, is gone. Still the tree is decorated. My ornaments hung without her this year. The memories attached to each handmade or ancient keepsake are solely mine now. It's a loneliness that permeates throughout the body. Still, the holiday season isn't as bad as I was expecting. There are low points, but mostly it is a steady pulse, nothing particularly joyous, but not wretched. Mostly I am content. <br />
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I still enjoy giving presents. Trying to find the right gifts for people. In that though I always see things I would get for my mom and have to turn away, or redirect myself. I do not believe in buying gifts for the dead. Materialism is one thing that they are gladly stripped of and the living left with. I wrap myself in ugly Christmas sweaters, all but one of which belonged to my mom. She did not think they were ugly and did not wear them ironically. She loved the cutest sayings and the like. Wearing them warms more than just my skin and makes me giggle at the memories. <br />
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I do feel the love of friends and family. They have not forgotten me. They know it's hard and that I do not want to be pestered with questions constantly, but they treat me like always. Like a whole person. I find myself returning to my Uncle's for holidays, something which we used to do when I was a child. The familiarity of this is comforting. It's normal for me to be there not somewhere I would have to go so as not to be alone but a place of belonging. It feels right. And I am lucky for that. And thankful. Everyone who has lost someone, and their traditions along with them, should be as lucky to feel as though they belong. So to the people who include us, try to understand us, listen, provide distraction, laugh with us, cry with us, and help us light the tree when there are so many reasons why it would be easier not to, thank you. <br />
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Thank you for telling me I am handling it well. It's a credit to my Mother. And thanks to her, and you, I know I can do this.<br />
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Sabrinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00155177315384058655noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6937763536427787784.post-21565785065776149872015-06-29T13:48:00.000-07:002016-01-28T09:49:03.853-08:00Flashbacks, FlashforwardIt's not unusual after a traumatic event to have flashbacks to it. I still have flashback to the last week that my Mom was fighting to stay alive. It was brutal. They used to completely paralyze me, an unwavering parade of scenes and imagines which I would rather forget. I still get those but when they happen I redirect my thoughts to happier times with my Mom, the memories I do not want to forget. Even the sound of her laugh. It's helped. Remembering that her life was far more than the last few months.<br />
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The last time I posted here I was just starting to come out of a very dark place. The crawl out of that pit was a slow one, it didn't happen all at once. Sort of like one day I felt like me again. Somewhere along the line I started living again, not just surviving.<br />
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Maybe it happened as we have fixed up my childhood home, my home for most of my life. Painting the walls, fixing the floors, raising the ceilings, updating the appliances and the electric along with a million other tiny things we have found along the way. Clearing out and fixing up the house seemed to do the same for me, for my mind. I was never much of a do-it-yourselfer. I always wanted to be and my pintrist will show that I found tons of things to do. But when you suddenly have an entire house to fix up you are forced to be put on your crafty gloves and just go at it. I'm not particularly good at most of these things. People have asked me about how I feel about the house being that's where my Mom died. Don't I feel weird having chosen her room for my own? The answer is simple and always has been. That house has been my home my entire life. I love every inch of that house/yard and I have a lifetime of wonderful memories filled with love. Not just the last two weeks of her life there. As for it being where my Mom died, it's also the same place where all of my pets died and while their loss wasn't the same, each of them was like family to me. I was there when almost all of them died so no it's not weird. Maybe if my Mom had been violently murdered and I had to clean blood off the walls it would be different. But I love my home and the memories that are there. It's a part of me. As far as choosing my Mom's old room for my own, it would have been weird for me to take my old room. I'm not entirely sure why, perhaps because that would seem a little too much like making the other room some sort of shrine. I grew up therefore, I left my childhood bedroom. My mom's room was also the place I always went when I was sick or upset. Being there now is still comforting, especially since my new bed is super comfortable. Mostly I look forward to creating new memories there and filling the house with love of a different sort. <br />
<br />Sabrinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00155177315384058655noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6937763536427787784.post-9313563831064202962015-05-05T11:04:00.002-07:002016-01-28T09:49:52.694-08:00Waiting for NormalMy life has been completely turned upside down. My Mom is gone, my lease on my apt is over and the house that I now solely own isn't done with the renovations. I have this overwhelming desire for my life to go back to normal. But whenever I realize this sense I find a deeper sadness because the normal my life used to have is gone forever. The cancer that stole my Mother away took that away as well.<br />
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I am not the me I was. I am quieter for starters. The anxiety that I have I can at least expect to pass when I am not invading other people's space with my things and my pets. But I know I, myself, will never be the same. Quiet. That was never a word to describe me. I don't particularly know what to say or who to say it to. I know I don't like that I am quiet. I hope that it passes. That I feel and act more like the me I remember.<br />
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When my Nana died, I remember that my Mom said she wanted to die as well. But what kept her here was her new baby, me. I never realized how alike my Mom and I are. I never felt suicidal but for a while there if I had seen a bus barreling at me, I don't believe I would have moved. That was scary. That was a low point. I am still here. I do believe that it'll get better. The waiting part just sucks. There is no better word to describe it but sucks. I have been actively trying to make it better. Planning things so I can look forward to fun things. To seeing those I love that I have left. I feel normal around them, the ones who battled this with me. They've seen it all, they remind me of the life I had and will have again. They are my hope, they still see me, even if I can't. They bring out the old Sabrina from her deep slumber. <br />
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Whatever my new normal is I eagerly await its arrival because this will not do as my normal. Normal will be better. Sabrinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00155177315384058655noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6937763536427787784.post-11956722719899769682015-04-07T22:25:00.002-07:002016-01-28T09:51:00.240-08:00Breaking the Silence Since Losing HerMy mother died an hour into her birthday. She was 61. The week prior I had moved home to help take care of her. At that point I knew she had only about a week left.<br />
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The memories of that week have been something I have actively tried to suppress, if I don't I cannot really function. The things that happened that week, the sharp decline, my mom losing the ability to communicate, the death rattle, and knowing that she was mentally aware of it all is a weight that is unbearable and one that cannot be lifted by my friends and family no matter how hard they may try. And I know that any of them reading this are not happy with my admitting what they may have suspected. Although, I know rationally it is bad to ignore memories and to push them down into the subconscious this is what allows me to function and rebuild my life. Losing her was terrible, living through those final days was the worst experience I could ever have imagined. Actually, it surpasses even my worst nightmare and believe me I have had quiet a few since.<br />
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I was with her when she died. When the death rattle stopped and she became quiet. When she stopped breathing I called out to her "Mom! Mom!" and she started breathing again. A minute or so later it happened again, she stopped breathing. Only this time my calling out to her did nothing. She was gone. She tried to stay with me, her mind was there. Her body just couldn't do it anymore. And that last week was so horrible on her I can't blame her body for giving out. She fought the good fight, it just got to be too much. Not all stories have a happy ending.<br />
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Everyone has their own opinion on how I <i>should </i>be handling things or how I <i>should </i>be acting. I get the "you have to deal with these feelings Sabrina." as though it were that easy. I've had anger at my emotions when they do surface because they are inconvenient or people do not understand how to handle them or me. Some are upset because they feel that I do not show enough emotion. That my loss does not weigh my soul down to the point where I cannot get out of bed. They would prefer for me showcase my suffering for their enjoyment. People seem to forget I am still me. A me that has suffered a trauma at the loss of my mother but I am me none the less. Some friends and family have disappeared completely from my life as well. They either do not know what to say to me or cannot face me for whatever reason. At any rate, I refuse to change my life, my coping mechanisms to better suit others who have no idea what it is like to walk in my shoes. As I write this, I am certain I am not the only person who has felt this way. The pressure from others on how to act when suffering a great loss. <br />
<br />
It hasn't been all bad. Most days I have so much to do that moving forward is the only choice I have. I have been blessed to have such wonderful friends, family and coworkers in my life who have been there for me throughout all of this. I have had much support, for as many people giving me a hard time or disappearing out of my life there have been 3 more to take their place and assure me that I am handling everything better than they thought anyone could. That I am strong and they admire me for living life. Or simply ones that are there for me, not treating me differently. I love them all for it.<br />
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<br />
I miss her.<br />
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I miss a thousand things about her and our relationship. Even something as simple as knowing I'd have at least one person to read my blog posts, her. My mother was my biggest supporter and fan. She loved me unconditionally and I her. The only thing that I wouldn't take back from that week, the memory that I would keep are the ones that convince me that she knew how loved she was. I take so much comfort in that. <br />
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<br />
Hug your mom's tighter. Tell them that you love them and treasure the time you have with them. And if you are going through something similar, or are simply surviving understand that you are not alone and you are doing fine. You will get through this. We both will.<br />
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<br />Sabrinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00155177315384058655noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6937763536427787784.post-9734192042008927012014-12-22T11:14:00.000-08:002016-01-28T09:52:13.657-08:00Memory<br />
I have a memory from when I was very young, maybe four. I know I wasn't in school yet. My Mom had to go away and have testing done for a week because of her brain injury and a family friend stayed with me. I remember the day we went to go get my Mom, not the ride there or anything, just when I saw her. I remember running up to her and wrapping my arms around her. She was wearing her black rabbit fur coat.I remember how soft it was and the smell. We were both crying.<br />
<br />
My Mom has been diagnosed with cancer in her lung, bone marrow, adrenal gland, liver and brain. She had been sick since the spring but we only found out the diagnosis in late October. I wasn't too surprised that it was cancer, just everywhere it is. Even still nothing prepares you for that moment. It's always been my Mom and me. Earlier this year we were going to the gym together 2-3 times a week. She started to not be able to go because she was so sick and couldn't use her arm. She quickly started to deteriorate and come September it seemed like we were constantly taking her to the Emergency Room, with them not doing anything to help. Having the person that loves you unconditionally and who you love the same, in such pain and in such condition is unbearable. Not being able to do something to help is maddening, frustrating and sickening. Anyone who has had someone they love horribly ill will understand this. That's also why I haven't been updating my blog. Writing anything is very emotional and somewhat difficult.<br />
<br />
When my Mom was diagnosed people warned me that my boyfriend would probably leave me. That I should be prepared for that possibility. To his credit he has stayed. What no one warned me about was my friends jumping ship. Some of the ones who have disappeared since my Mom got sick are not too surprising, the absence of others has been staggering. Whether they feel slighted because I haven't been in contact with them (my Mom as stated has been sick for almost 9 months now and for the most part, until the diagnosis, I didn't really talk about it and started to keep more to myself), they don't know what to say to me or I simply no longer serve any use to them. I honestly don't really care because the results are the same. On the flip side I am lucky enough to have some very amazing people in my life who have pulled very close together to me during all of this. Both new friends and old. My Mom has been so touched by the amount of love and support she has received from "the kids" I hung out with in high school and their families, her friends, my coworkers, college friends and our family. My Mom was a stay at home Mom because of her disability so she was always the one that drove me and my friends around so they all got to know her really well and she always loved having everyone around. Seeing them all now and that they remember her and care has really made her feel loved. Her worry is that people will forget about her and she'll be left alone in some room somewhere and that has been alleviated by all visitors, calls and cards.<br />
<br />
My Mom still plans on beating this. She currently can't keep food down and is still undergoing both chemo and radiation so she is still in the hospital and that's where she'll be spending the holidays. That was a bit of a heavy blow to both of us. But I've decorated her hospital room with a little light up tree and all of the Christmas cards that have been sent. Her Christmas presents all have to be in gift bags because she's not really strong enough to open anything wrapped. Once she is able to keep food down they're moving her to a rehabilitation center so she can begin to build her strength back. We keep moving forward, planning for when she comes home because that's all we can do. Anything else is not imaginable. The week I spent without her as a child was difficult, I can't imagine being without her again even as an adult.<br />
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<br />Sabrinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00155177315384058655noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6937763536427787784.post-50948305639444085272014-10-08T15:26:00.002-07:002014-10-08T15:26:45.670-07:00Why Your Pink Ribbon is Bullshit<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br />
I
am completely for charitable giving to worthy charities. To me in order
to be worthy you must not only claim to represent a cause but also
actually show where the money goes to help that cause. That is why the
Pink Ribbon campaign is complete bullshit. A little background checking
will show you that they do not disclose how much of their funds go to
actual breast cancer research or to helping cancer patients. <br />
<br />
Most
things that you think you are donating to in hopes of supporting
research or something worth a damn that has a pink ribbon on it exists
solely to jack up the price of the item. To further prove that the Susan
G. Koman foundation/pink ribbon campaign does not give a shit about
women or breast cancer they have recently teamed up with Baker Highes an
oil drilling company that uses fracking. You know fracking which causes
various health problems including cancer. "<a href="http://ecowatch.com/2014/10/08/pinkwashing-susan-korman-baker-hughes/">Fracking
exposes workers to high levels of many known carcinogens, such
as benzene, which has been linked to–you guessed it–breast cancer." </a>Let's
be clear. They think we are all stupid enough not to make this
connection. Personally I am waiting for Pink Ribbon Cigarettes, Light Up
For A Cause! There are good charities to donate to just not this one.
Do your research, don't be lazy. Don't just throw your money at
something claims do something. I've had a family member die of breast
cancer. It's not pretty, no matter how many cute little pink ribbons you
put on it.<br />
<br />
I highly recommend the book Pink Ribbon Blues if you have an interest in this subject. <br />
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**Dear readers,<br />
I am sorry that I have not posted in what seems like forever. I have been ever busy but I will try to get back on track.<br />
XoxoSabrinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00155177315384058655noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6937763536427787784.post-87142566547896283272014-09-03T18:55:00.001-07:002014-09-03T19:06:46.336-07:00Nudes, Rape and Video Games: A Feminist Explosion So this week so much has happened that I didn't know which subject to even discuss. So I am going to try and discuss them all. Here we go....<br />
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1) Nude photos of celebrities leaked. This is the same problem that we have continued to have only instead of sex tapes being stolen from vaults they are being taken off of iclouds. Personally, I am paranoid and don't believe in doing nudes however, I am not about to sit back and say things like "what did they expect?" or "they got what they deserved". Victim blaming, how not surprising. Hell even when photos are taken of women and they are not aware they are the ones blamed. None of what has happened is in the least surprising although I do feel really angry for those women and I believe in the one case girl. The Olympian who had her photos taken was underage(child porn rears its ugly head). And let me be clear, everyone who went and looked at those photos you are part of the problem. You're why people leak nudes of women/girls because there are consumers for it. That and it's a great way to try and ruin a woman's life because that's still how we judge women the virgin/whore dichotomy. We are always supposed to be desirable but not touchable, an impossible line to walk. <br />
<br />
2) The student who is dragging her mattress around campus. At first I wasn't quite sure what this young woman was trying to accomplish. The act didn't stand out to me as *<b>BAM* this is what's up! </b>But after doing some reading and finding out that she was raped on her mattress and that dragging the mattress around symbolizes the weight of being raped everything made a lot more sense. The young woman is a performance artist which makes a lot more sense to how she got the idea. I do hope that she is successful and having her rapist expelled. Campus' need to take sexual assaults more seriously. Even from a business standpoint taking sexual assault more seriously makes sense. Female students pay just as much in tuition as male students and currently more women are enrolling in higher education.<br />
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3) Feminist Frequency and the threats. I am dating a gamer. He hates feminist frequency because they rip apart his hobby which is understandable. He's allowed to disagree. Just as they are allowed to have their video blog and give their opinions about whatever. Nothing wrong with any of it. However, once you start threatening someone to the point where they have to leave their home. That's an issue. That's a big fucking issue. And also it is counter active to what those who are threatening points. "No video games don't promote violence or hatred towards women. But bitch if you keep talking about it I'm going to break into your home and rape you until you're dead." Yeah...umm..nice going there...totally made your point. That is if your point is that you're stupid; like too stupid to function. As to whether or not video games promote hatred of women, certain ones certainly can promote misogynistic ideas about women which a lot of things do because we live in a patriarchal society so there's no big shock there. Games where the object is to stalk and rape women (there's a Japanese computer game where the object is to stalk and rape a mother and daughter) I do believe are disgusting and should not be in existence and are clearly promoting violence against women and making a game of it. Are all video games bad? No. Are gamers all bad? No. Are the people who threaten and harass vlogers with violence barely an excuse for humans? Yes. Sabrinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00155177315384058655noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6937763536427787784.post-87232611961185591142014-08-26T15:41:00.004-07:002014-08-26T15:47:20.572-07:00Why #WeallneedfeminismThe #WhyINeedFeminism hashtag was a good idea. And fits with third wave feminism focus on the individual. I, however, am strongly in the second wave camp. We are all individuals but seeing ourselves as purely individuals is a great way to make sure nothing gets accomplished. We need to view ourselves as a group and understand that as a group feminism takes on different forms for us all. For example as a American Feminist the problems I face are different from a Iranian Feminist. We both have the same overall goal, equality, but different factors that we cannot control change the priority of issues changes based on our individual needs. Religion, race, age, sexuality, gender, class, occupation and location all factor into what we place as high priority issues.<br />
<br />
So I have complied a list of five reasons why we all need feminism as the human race. Obviously this list can go on but I decided to limit it to just five for now. Perhaps someday I will do a part two. <br />
<br />
1. #Weallneedfeminism because of human trafficking. Children as young as four are taken or sold into human slavery, usually sexual slavery. There are currently more modern day slaves than there were when slavery was legal in the United States and in most of the world. <br />
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<br />
2. #Weallneedfeminism because of genital mutilation of both boys and girls. Women and girls around the world are subjected to genital mutilation that ranges from cutting of the clitoris to the complete removal of of the clitoris and vaginal lips. The idea being to control female sexuality and to keep women from cheating on their husbands by taking the pleasure out of sex. Then their is male genital mutilation otherwise known as male circumcision and is mostly practiced in the United States. This is probably going to make a bunch of parents mad but that doesn't change the fact that male circumcision is still genital mutilation. There is no medical or hygienic reason to circumcise boys. It is purely for looks and it does decrease the sexual pleasure of males. And also let me say for the record, uncircumcised penis' do not look weird or unattractive. They look like dicks, get over it.<br />
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3. #Weallneedfeminism because we need to put an end to violence against women whether it be intimate partner abuse, sexual abuse, rape, bride burning, burning with acid whatever the violence. And we need to stop making those stupid violence against women jokes/rape jokes. a) You run a real risk or traumatizing someone because statistically you are saying those jokes/comments around someone who is a victim/survivor and no you probably don't know it because with the stupid shit that is spewing out of your mouth they surely won't be telling you. b) You are reaffirming that what the abuser/rapist/molester does/has done is not only okay and socially acceptable but that it is funny. Nice job asshat. And no you probably are not aware that your coworker John goes home and beats the shit out of his wife and kids because it is still illegal to do so. Or that your friend George on occasions rapes his dates when they don't want to put out after he has paid for a date. It's not funny. You are not funny. You sound like an ignorant scum bag.<br />
<br />
4. #Weallneedfeminism because a woman's body is her own and so is the choice as to whether or not we have children, when we have them and how many we have. Unplanned pregnancies can have a wide array of repercussions including poverty, single parent households, higher rates of abortion, more kids in the foster system and so on. Abstinence only education simply does not work. Instead what research has found that students who were taught through the abstinence only method were still having sex they were just doing so without the use of condoms or birth control leading to higher rates of pregnancy and STDs. And unplanned pregnancies tend to trap women into bad marriages and into lower incomes, often times because they then have to stay home and take care of the children, world wide.<br />
<br />
5. #Weallneedfeminism because women are not taken seriously. If we express any strong emotions we are either bitches or irrational. We can never just be rightfully angry or upset, we're either hysterical, over-reacting or PMSing. This also ties into how women aren't taken seriously when they are abused. We're exaggerating or just saying it happened to ruin the abuser's/rapist's life. This needs to stop. Someone is more likely to fake their own death than to lie about being raped.<br />
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<br />Sabrinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00155177315384058655noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6937763536427787784.post-60199364466652835602014-08-12T15:00:00.003-07:002014-08-12T15:46:12.124-07:00I Like Everyone Else Am Devistated Yesterday the news broke that Robin Williams took his own life. The man who <span data-ft="{"tn":"K"}" data-reactid=".1.1:3:1:$comment10204281017656453_10204281163660103:0.0.$right.0.$left.0.0.1:$comment-body"><span class="UFICommentBody" data-reactid=".1.1:3:1:$comment10204281017656453_10204281163660103:0.0.$right.0.$left.0.0.1:$comment-body.0"><span data-reactid=".1.1:3:1:$comment10204281017656453_10204281163660103:0.0.$right.0.$left.0.0.1:$comment-body.0.$end:0:$0:0">brought so much happiness to the world, in the end he couldn't find his own. Robin Williams touch all of our lives and made the world a happier place throughout his lifetime. A light has definitely gone out in the world. </span></span></span><br />
<br />
And I say world because it is not just the United States that will miss him. Even animals have shown sign of <a href="http://www.buzzfeed.com/ellievhall/these-photos-of-koko-the-gorilla-mourning-the-loss-of-robin?bffb">mourning Robin Williams.</a> Koko was mentioned in William's one HBO special that he did and the two clearly had a wonderful bond.<br />
<br />
<br />
<span data-ft="{"tn":"K"}" data-reactid=".1.1:3:1:$comment10204281017656453_10204281163660103:0.0.$right.0.$left.0.0.1:$comment-body"><span class="UFICommentBody" data-reactid=".1.1:3:1:$comment10204281017656453_10204281163660103:0.0.$right.0.$left.0.0.1:$comment-body.0"><span data-reactid=".1.1:3:1:$comment10204281017656453_10204281163660103:0.0.$right.0.$left.0.0.1:$comment-body.0.$end:0:$0:0">I myself am not a religious person by any means. However, I hope that there is someway that Robin Williams is able to sense how much he was and is loved. To understand that we all mourn his loss and that his life was not in vain. I truly am at a loss for words. </span></span></span><br />
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<br />
<span data-ft="{"tn":"K"}" data-reactid=".1.1:3:1:$comment10204281017656453_10204281163660103:0.0.$right.0.$left.0.0.1:$comment-body"><span class="UFICommentBody" data-reactid=".1.1:3:1:$comment10204281017656453_10204281163660103:0.0.$right.0.$left.0.0.1:$comment-body.0"><span data-reactid=".1.1:3:1:$comment10204281017656453_10204281163660103:0.0.$right.0.$left.0.0.1:$comment-body.0.$end:0:$0:0">May you have finally found some peace.</span></span></span><br />
<br />
<span data-ft="{"tn":"K"}" data-reactid=".1.1:3:1:$comment10204281017656453_10204281163660103:0.0.$right.0.$left.0.0.1:$comment-body"><span class="UFICommentBody" data-reactid=".1.1:3:1:$comment10204281017656453_10204281163660103:0.0.$right.0.$left.0.0.1:$comment-body.0"><span data-reactid=".1.1:3:1:$comment10204281017656453_10204281163660103:0.0.$right.0.$left.0.0.1:$comment-body.0.$end:0:$0:0"><br /></span></span></span>Sabrinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00155177315384058655noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6937763536427787784.post-34653144917747380472014-08-06T13:23:00.001-07:002014-08-06T13:23:53.392-07:00Because I Don't Want to Get Down With the SicknessFor the first time in my life I appear to have a really good immune system. I haven't been really sick in over a year at this point and while I am terrified that I am currently jinxing myself by writing this, I'm going to continue. *Watch next week I have West Nile and Ebola* <br />
<br />
The secret to my health is a partially due to working with kids for over two years. I was almost constantly sick the first year and half, kids will do that to you. But my doctor was right and my immune system eventually said "Screw this being sick stuff" and I've been pretty healthy since. But the secret to how I didn't die during that year and a half and how every time I start to feel like I might be getting sick and the next day I am all better is simple: Apple Cider Vinegar.<br />
<br />
When I was in graduate school I lived with a vegan couple who had fantastic health. And sure enough when I started to get sick they shared with me the all powerful apple cider vinegar. They drink it whenever they feel like they are getting sick. It kills all of the bacteria in your throat and stomach that is trying to make you sick. Now I was highly skeptical of this especially since they were drinking it right out of a bottle as though it was some delicious tea. But Meg and Jim assured me that I didn't need to chug a bottle of the stuff. So I gave it a whirl. I had shot glasses that I would fill halfway and slam it. Now I am not going to lie to you, I also have pinch my nose shut as I did this. I never questioned their claim that it killed at all of the bacteria because I could feel it doing it and after my throat wouldn't hurt.<br />
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My boyfriend swears it doesn't work however last night when I said I thought I was getting sick the first thing he said was "Do you want the apple cider vinegar?". Today I feel fine. Now the ACV trick doesn't work if you're knee deep in sickness, it may help you get over it quicker but the best time to use it is when you first notice that you are coming down with something. Some people suggest drinking it every day to improve health. And while studies have shown that there are health benefits to it I just haven't graduated to a stage where I am okay drinking ACV on a daily basis. Sabrinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00155177315384058655noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6937763536427787784.post-30465399925311719822014-07-23T12:21:00.000-07:002014-07-30T19:53:31.058-07:00The False Empowerment of the American Strip Tease Dancer*Sorry this wasn't posted yesterday my mother is in the hospital again*<br />
<br />
This one time I wrote a thesis it took about 3 years of research and revision but I wrote it. Sounds simple right? And this thesis has now been copyrighted and published. So here is the intro to my thesis because well I can. <br />
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Also you can buy my book here! http://gradworks.umi.com/15/25/1525167.html<br />
<b>Introduction</b><br />
<br />
The purpose of this thesis is to evaluate an argument made since the beginning of feminism’s <br />
<br />
Third Wave: that the work of female strippers is empowering to the women who perform in strip clubs. Pro-sex work feminists such as Carol Leigh, who coined the phrase “sex worker,”Jill Nagle, who wrote Whores and Other Feminists, and Katherine Frank, who wrote From G-Strings to Sympathy, argue that women who strip are taking control of their sexuality and defying patriarchy. These feminist thinkers also hold that strippers are empowered because they hold the power in relation to the men they encounter in the clubs. This thesis will focus solely on the American female strip tease dancer who works within clubs. This focus was chosen because while stripping is arguably the most socially accepted form of sex work, the area of strip work is severely lacking in research and academic study. This thesis will name and systematically explore the key elements of the strip industry that serve to disempower female workers: the lifestyle which the women engage in, the protocol of the clubs themselves, the club customers, the connection strip clubs have to organized crime, and the mental and emotional state of the women within the industry. Feminism’s main goal is to try to create equality between the sexes mainly by empowering women. And in order to understand where feminism is now in regards to exotic dancers, we must first understand how feminism has evolved in regards to the sexual revolution. First wave feminists believed that women would be empowered when they had the same education level that their male counterparts had and when women had the same legal rights as men. This belief was carried on by second wave and radical feminists, with the added belief that women’s<br />
reproductive and sexual freedom, brought on by the invention of oral contraceptives, would finally empower all women. Oral contraceptives gave women the power to control their own fertility. A woman being able to control her fertility has helped women enter the work force and stay there without having unwanted pregnancies limit the female potential in the public sphere. At the same time Roe vs Wade gave women the right to safe and legal abortions, which was yet another alternative to undesired pregnancies. But because of this new found sexual freedom two distinct factions began to emerge with very different ideas on the subject as Ariel Levy explains in her book Female Chauvinist Pigs: Women and the Rise of Raunch Culture: <br />
<br />
On one hand there were antiporn feminists, and on the other, there were the <br />
<br />
women who felt that if feminism was about for women, then women should <br />
<br />
be free to look at or appear in pornography. Screaming fights became a regular <br />
<br />
element of feminist conferences once the ‘pornography wars’ got underway in <br />
<br />
the late seventies. The term ‘sex-positive feminist’ first came into use at this <br />
<br />
time. It was employed by the members of the women’s movement who wanted <br />
<br />
to distinguish themselves from the antiporn faction. But, of course, all of the <br />
<br />
feminists thought they were being sexpostitive...[Antiporn feminists] felt they <br />
<br />
were liberating women from degrading sexual stereotypes and a culture of male <br />
<br />
domination and—consequently—making room for greater female sexual pleasure. <br />
<br />
(62-63)<br />
<br />
Third wave feminists saw more women entering into higher education than their male<br />
counterparts, this also meant even more women in the workforce. Due to both their college and work experience, women now had new access on a sexual and romantic level to more men. In the Third wave there still remained the problem of women’s empowerment, carried over from the second waves “pornography wars.” During this time in feminism, neo-liberal sex positive feminist politics and ideology became the dominant voice of the feminist movement. Kim Price-Glynn in her book Strip Club: Gender, Power and Sex Work discusses some of the cultural changes that were taking place at this time in American culture: “Since the late 1990s, print media and film have lavished attention on stripping and erotic dance performances, collapsing the space between deviant activities and everyday life”(34). Price-Glynn goes onto say that shows such as Howard Stern and The Girls Next Store have helped to market sex work to the general public, propelling sexpositive feminism along with it(34). <br />
<br />
Unlike previous feminists, liberal sex positive feminists, such as Carol Leigh (In Defense of Prostitution), believe that sex work is empowering to the women who perform it and they hold that sex work is like any other job. Liberal feminists, such as Sheila Nevins the President of Documentary Films at HBO and Robin Quivers from the The Howard Stern Show, believe that equality will happen when just as many women are doing what men already are. This ideology is flawed to radical feminists, such as Catherine Mackinnon and Susan Brownmiller who were leaders of the antiporn movement, because liberals endorse the masculine as the norm that all women should strive for, and in the process alienate the feminine as “other,” which already occurs within patriarchy. Also if one carries the idea out fully then liberal feminists want as many female serial killers and rapists as there are male, whereas radical feminists want to eradicate serial killers and rapists. Neo-liberal sex positive feminist philosophy holds that strip work elevates the selfesteem of women performing it. A study done by Bernadette Barton showed that initially strippers experience higher self-esteem levels than before they started dancing (145). It also showed that stripping itself does hold certain monetary advantages, and money does give a certain amount of power to the one making it. On average, people who lack a college degree and work fulltime make approximately $21,000 a year according to the National Center for Educational Statistics website for 2010(U.S. Department of Education). However, <br />
strippers who have this same underprivileged background stand to make on average $26,000 a year working fewer hours per week than any other legal job available to them (Price-Glynn 57). And, unlike many other jobs, stripping does have very flexible hours which makes it perfect for both students and mothers alike. The third wave’s view is that these conditions make strip work empowering for the women who perform it. <br />
The problem that other feminists have with this argument is that stripping reinforces the idea that women are only valuable based on their sexuality: a sexuality that someone else has made and packaged for them to sell. By no means are strippers performing their own sexuality, especially those who are lesbians and perform for male clients. The research by Barton has shown that strippers do experience a self-esteem boost initially but, after dancing for six months to a year, their self-esteem takes a dive (145). And while some strippers become wealthy and can move up in the world, those women are the exception not the rule. Strippers now face a problem due to new technologies that allow men to take photographs and videos on their phones and post them on the internet, a former stripper stands to lose her job if this kind of evidence surfaces,<br />
which will be addressed in chapter 4 with news articles from the past several years, that went public after professional women were revealed to have been former strippers and were fired from their jobs. <br />
<br />
Since the question of whether or not strip work is true empowerment is a complex question with many avenues to explore, this thesis will focus its attention on different aspects of both the strip club industry and the lives of the women who work in these club instead of just focusing on one or the other like researchers of the past have tended to do. This thesis will also incorporate stripper narratives in order to make its argument, which is something that has never been done before. The strippers who wrote these narratives are shedding light on what the strip industry is like from the perspective of someone within it. And, while these women are not objective, they are currently the only experts on the topics of stripping and their lives. Their voices are needed in this arena because if strippers’ voices are ignored, then feminists are coconspirators in their oppression. <br />
<br />
This thesis will focus only on narratives that appear after the 1990s because during the 1980s the industry changed into what we see today. In the late 1980s some dissent started to occur in feminist communities due to ideological shifts from radical feminism to liberal pro-sex feminism. Because of this, during the 1990s, a new wave of feminism emerged. The 1990s pro-sex liberal or neo-liberal feminists focuses on the individual and centers on individual agency. Problems arise from this idea of individualism because everything then becomes a ”choice”and any questioning of that choice means that one is eliminating an individual’s agency. Liere Keith has stated publically, at the annual Radical Feminist Conference hosted by Gail Dines which I attended in June 2011, that neo-liberalist feminism makes women compliant with their own oppression. Keith was kind enough to provide me with a transcript of her slide show for the use in this thesis. Keith explains in the slide show that radical feminists see the group as the basic unit of human society, not the individual. She also points out the radicals see that “social life is comprised of a complex political determinism and the oppressed do not make or control conditions” (Keith 1-2). Keith goes onto say that liberal feminism discounts these outside factors, such as social conditions, as having any bearing on these decisions. <br />
This is important when it comes to the sex industry because with liberal feminism there is no delving into what outside factors influenced a sex worker to make that “choice,” if she had other options available to her, or what social constructs she would have to conform to. There also is no research currently about what happens to women who work in the strip industry after they leave it. There has been no study to show how this industry affects the lives of women later on in life. Radical feminism refutes the point that outside factors do not contribute to a person’s decision and holds that a person is limited by their social standing if they are among the oppressed which women, as a group, are. By denying classification to groups, neo-liberal feminists cannot see women as a class or group, which is at odds with all feminist ideas that came before because by definition, “Feminism is the political practice of fighting male supremacy on behalf of women as a class” (Dworkin qtd. in Keith 7). Radical feminists believe that the erosion of women’s rights that has gone on since the 1990s is due greatly to the influence of third wave/neo-liberal sex positive feminist thinking. Once neo-liberal feminism came to the forefront of the feminist movement the sex industry and sex trafficking both have seen a major boom in business. Erin Kuntze states that “between 1987 and 2000 the number of exotic dance clubs in the United States doubled” (9). This is not to say that third wave feminism is what created the sex trafficking and the strip industry boom; however, the conceptualization of women’s sexual liberation supported, instead of contested these ideas and cultural shifts. The sex industry has pushed its way into mainstream culture without ever modifying the power dynamics or the treatment of the female workers within the industry. Feminist thinkers and activists such as Gail Dines have started to bring light to the issues of power dynamics, racism and abuse within the sex industry. However, these feminists usually focus on one particular area of the sex industry; for example, Dines’s area of interest focused solely on pornography. The increased numbers of sex trafficking victims and the sex industry boom is a link that some feminist scholars and activists are just now realizing and exploring. <br />
There are three kinds of research on strippers and the strip industry: studies of strippers, accounts by strippers, and researchers who pose as strippers. As mentioned before, no other work deals solely with the false empowerment of strip tease dancers, and for those works that do, they use this false empowerment as a justification for another point that they are trying to make. Most of the research done on strippers deals with life inside the club and the abuse the dancers face, whereas the narratives explore the strip clubs and dancers’ lives outside the strip club more thoroughly. In her article “Keeping Women Down and Out: The Strip Club Boom and the Reinforcement of Male Dominance,” Shelia Jeffreys discusses how strip work keeps women in a submissive role in American male dominated society (Jeffreys 183). During this decade there has also been a large number of stripper memoirs published, such as Flesh for Fantasy, which is a collection of stripper essays, and Sarah Katherine Lewis’ Indecent: How I Make It and Fake It as a Girl for Hire. These works are useful as they give firsthand accounts of the lives of a strip tease dancer giving the women a chance to tell their point of view. Both of the above memoirs tell of the horrors and joys of being in the strip industry and also how they each found their way into the industry and the effects the industry has had on them. Because this thesis is researching empowerment, the voices of strippers and their firsthand accounts need to be included. The dancers may state if they believe they are empowered or not; however, their self reporting of their feelings towards empowerment is not what is always important here – but rather the stories they share of the interactions in the club and outside of it. These narratives are, in essence, long interviews that the reader can look to for insight into issues of empowerment and agency. Bear in mind that because these are firsthand accounts about the author’s lives and experiences, their views may be skewed because of how they are naturally embedded in their stories. <br />
There is another avenue of research, and that is student researchers posing as strippers, usually for their doctoral dissertation or master’s thesis. Katherine Frank’s dissertation G-Strings to Sympathy at first focuses on the women who strip and the policies that the typical club has. However, her research and fascination quickly turn to the men who come into the strip clubs as regulars. Frank inquires as to why these men keeping coming back to the clubs, and for the customers who are married, she questions what their relationships are like with their wives. The beginning of Frank’s book focuses more on what she as a stripper encountered and then her focus shifts to the men who are her regulars and what these men think and feel about strippers. <br />
This shift is an important element as to why stripping is false empowerment for women. The men interviewed clearly state that they come to strip clubs because they view the clubs as keeping men in their rightful place, in control. The customers are the ones with the money so the dancers must please them and act as the customer feels that they should, thusly reinforcing certain gender stereotypes. Throughout the academic research that has been published on strippers using firsthand accounts, there is one common factor: all of the women make sure that everyone in the club, including the male patrons, knows that they are there as researchers and that stripping will not be a career path for them. The repeated public announcement of their role as student/researcher and not a “real” stripper is very important as it affects the way in which not only their coworkers and customers treat them but also how they think of themselves. Both Frank and Kuntze at different points in their work, after having a bad night, reassure themselves that they are not really as strippers/waitresses but are there as students. They both find comfort in this and are able to reassure themselves of their worth – unlike most female strip club workers who do not have many other career options. This thesis will name and explore systematically the key elements of the strip industry that serve to disempower female workers. These elements will include the lifestyle which the women engage in, the protocol of the clubs themselves, the club customers, the connection strip clubs have to organized crime, and the mental and emotional state of the women within the industry. <br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
So that's it folks as far as the intro goes. <br />
<br />Sabrinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00155177315384058655noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6937763536427787784.post-28594865042910538722014-07-15T12:32:00.001-07:002014-07-15T14:49:35.937-07:00A Male Feminist What is This You Say?<span style="background-color: #f7f7f7;"><span style="color: #3e454c; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, lucida grande, tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: 12px; line-height: 15.359999656677246px; white-space: pre-wrap;">I have decided to try something out. The idea came to me because I know so many wonderful feminists. About once a month I am going to interview someone. This month I went with an unlikely feminist, my dear friend Sean. Sean is not what people imagine when they hear the word "feminist" but he wears the title proudly. (We actually have match bumper stickers that say "This is What a Feminist Looks Like"). Sean is a conservative, christian male and he's heterosexual. Sean and I met in college and if I completely take credit for taking him under my feminist wing. We've gone to feminist conferences together and have done a mock rape trial. Sean and I disagree on different issues, mainly abortion, but we still both fight the good fight and proudly call ourselves feminists. </span></span></span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhjAVJxmi7iE03fE5GlROCpcrkwSs8Spd0H7P8-uJa_Slf85qiglPjB7UuhSiGKYf0UzpgXuEtmjBkCDfOkjF2iEuHYNt4K-McQIx0X_0M7hZ5YOhAHLlGyb2RlRYC5qnEWOlIS8WcX9J4/s1600/217720_624680618347_837323651_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhjAVJxmi7iE03fE5GlROCpcrkwSs8Spd0H7P8-uJa_Slf85qiglPjB7UuhSiGKYf0UzpgXuEtmjBkCDfOkjF2iEuHYNt4K-McQIx0X_0M7hZ5YOhAHLlGyb2RlRYC5qnEWOlIS8WcX9J4/s1600/217720_624680618347_837323651_n.jpg" height="320" width="320" /></a><span style="background-color: #f7f7f7;"><span style="color: #3e454c; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, lucida grande, tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: 12px; line-height: 15.359999656677246px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><b>Q: How did you become a feminist?</b>
<b>A: </b>While attending college for my bachelor’s degree I had been taking
classes that were cross-listed as women’s studies courses. This was also
around the time I met my good friend Sabrina. I recognized women’s
right, but did not understand that equality was something to be grasped,
and I did not see how saturated our culture was with misogyny until
having many of those late night “academic” pontificates with Sabrina.
She basically gave me the lingo to describe what I was feeling and
observing about the world around me, and the name of the movement
working to change it: Feminism.
<b>
Q: Do you feel it is important for men to identify as “feminists”? And why?</b>
<b>A: </b>Identifying as a feminist means that I acknowledge women as equals, and
that I support the equal treatment of everyone. Without putting a name
on it the values are more easily made fluid and able to slip away.
That’s why we label things, so that we know what to call something, and
how to categorize it. If I identify as a feminist and a man, then
others will ask question and start to see what feminism is all about.
Men will also be more held to that standard in community with other
feminists.
<b>Q: Have you faced any challenges as a male feminist? If so, what?</b>
<b>A: </b>Yes. Mostly I deal with shock and awe of being both a man and a
feminist, which follows an explanation of what feminism is, and why I am
one. I haven’t faced many challenges, but my sexually has often been
questioned. (Sabrina’s favorite response to that is: “He’s not gay,
he’s religious,” which seems to satisfy any curiosity). In 2011, I
attended an international radical feminist conference on Stop Porn
Culture that was hosted by Dr. Gail Dines at Wheelock College in Boston
with Sabrina. She knows exactly what I’m going to say. Feminism has
prejudicially been mislabeled as a group of women who hate men and burn
bras. Although I’ve never seen the bra burnings, I have experienced the
man hating. I had asked a simple question in regard to men getting
involved in rape prevention and this young woman from across the room
interrupted and gave me the finger. Taking this at face value one might
get the wrong impression of feminism. To give you the full picture,
this woman had announced earlier how she was repeatedly raped in
adolescence and force to make porn. This was not the case of a feminist
hating men (nor is it the norm among feminists), but rather of a deeply
hurt woman lashing out at anyone who might resemble or support her
attackers; however some prejudice does come up when hurt people are
looking for a medium by which to seek vengeance rather than restorative
justice. </span></span></span><span style="background-color: #f7f7f7;"><span style="color: #3e454c; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, lucida grande, tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: 12px; line-height: 15.359999656677246px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><b> </b></span></span></span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi2-3767b7oVyaDBOjQeYCHGJX-sI-xS3l2ghRTPzvnBFZUvjs88tMvpAvrmruNHqx34BCi0G7eEtKd2kH0kTYTbO3e8Rzwm3ZV-XEUilNHOAbeC23oilFrlGDRekj7rdIpCkck2_JNROk/s1600/305394_569648682787_128879338_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi2-3767b7oVyaDBOjQeYCHGJX-sI-xS3l2ghRTPzvnBFZUvjs88tMvpAvrmruNHqx34BCi0G7eEtKd2kH0kTYTbO3e8Rzwm3ZV-XEUilNHOAbeC23oilFrlGDRekj7rdIpCkck2_JNROk/s1600/305394_569648682787_128879338_n.jpg" height="240" width="320" /></a><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: #f7f7f7;"><span style="color: #3e454c;"><span style="line-height: 15.36px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><b>Q: </b></span></span></span><span data-ft="{"tn":"K"}" data-reactid=".dz.1:3:1:$comment757718145077_757721468417:0.0.$right.0.$left.0.0.1:$comment-body"><span class="UFICommentBody" data-reactid=".dz.1:3:1:$comment757718145077_757721468417:0.0.$right.0.$left.0.0.1:$comment-body.0"><b><span data-reactid=".dz.1:3:1:$comment757718145077_757721468417:0.0.$right.0.$left.0.0.1:$comment-body.0.$end:0:$4:0">What does being a male feminist look like to you?</span></b><br data-reactid=".dz.1:3:1:$comment757718145077_757721468417:0.0.$right.0.$left.0.0.1:$comment-body.0.$end:0:$5:0" /><br data-reactid=".dz.1:3:1:$comment757718145077_757721468417:0.0.$right.0.$left.0.0.1:$comment-body.0.$end:0:$7:0" /><span data-reactid=".dz.1:3:1:$comment757718145077_757721468417:0.0.$right.0.$left.0.0.1:$comment-body.0.$end:0:$8:0">Being
a man and a feminist means that I should embrace my sexual and gender
identity of being a man without using that status to look down on
others; men are no better than women, and I am certainly no better than
anyone. Not only am I a feminist and a man, but I’m also politically
conservative (meaning I prefer a smaller federal government), and a
Christian. Wait a minute… What? Yes, I’m a conservative, Christian,
feminist. Hear me out on this. Feminism is the movement to take back
what men in predominant cultures and peoples have stripped away from the
women, children, and the less fortunate throughout history. As a man
my greatest role model is a carpenter from Nazareth named Jesus Christ,
who ate with the beggars, tax collectors (traitors), and women (who were
property in the 1st century A.D.). The best example of this comes from
the gospel of John 4:1-26, when Jesus encounters a Samaritan (half
Jewish, hated by the Israelites) woman at a well in the middle of the
day. It’s VERY hot midday in the Middle East, so she was out when no
one else would be, and the woman admits to having had 5 husbands and
currently living with a man she wasn’t married too, which is a HUGE
stigma. This is the equivalent of a white man in the south during the
1950s politely acknowledging the existence of a black woman in Alabama.
So this event describes a man in the first century tearing down the
barriers of sex, race, and social stigma. Jesus approached the woman
bearing the scarlet letter with boldness and humility, and he didn’t
judge her. This later continued with the early church acknowledging
women as people, rather than property, and supporting widows and
beggars. Ok Sean, I don’t own people, and I’m not a bigot, so what are
you getting at? My point is that feminism is about restoring what the
Jews referred to as shalom, or the natural peace that was meant to be
found in the interwoven fabric of society. That’s what Christ came to
do, and that’s what I want to be a part of.</span></span></span></span></span>Sabrinahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00155177315384058655noreply@blogger.com0